+1 quagmire

It's really sad these two are unfollowing each other at a time when the Bears could really use a strong RT.

I am a Bears fan, and I was excited about that Denver loss because I hoped John Fox would be available after he got canned. Yes, he probably should have won a Super Bowl, but it's not easy to win championships even with HOF QBs . He had the Broncos playing at a high level during his tenure there.

DOOR FLIES OPEN

People would be less concerned if his QBR was higher than his BAC. Until that happens, he's going to be viewed as a drunk.

+1 pick-six pack

That is a completely irrelevant comparison. He had to sell an organization with a large number of black employees because his racist asshattery finally became too much for the parent organization to bear. Any owner of any professional sports team in America would be subject to similar punishment if that person did…

I'm going to eat a large bowl of Skyline chili so that the end of the world won't seem so bad.

I went to visit my parents over the holidays, and they had a fresh, unspoiled bag of Thomas's English Muffins (which I never buy because I'm a moron). I not only loaded it with butter, I made my own egg and bacon muffin sandwich, which made me feel like I owned my own McDonald's and could order off the breakfast menu…

I can't tell if that is bad electronic drum playing or bad drum machine programming. The little snare fills sound like me trying to play along in Rock Band after too much eggnog.

It's not surprising Harbaugh repeatedly went after a slow, undersized, non-threatening target. He spent most of his Bears career throwing to Tom Waddle.

They should have a version of Hard Knocks that airs at the end of the season and follows coaches around who are on the chopping block. Imagine a scene where Jerry Richardson has Ron Rivera in his office, giving him a vote of confidence, and then Bill Cowher phones in to return Richardson's earlier call about coaching…

A Jordan Palmer is like an Arnold Palmer, only it tastes like shit, throws interceptions against fourth-stringers in preseason games, and gives you corneal herpes if you watch him with the naked eye. So, in retrospect, nothing like an Arnold Palmer.

The Bears are a car wreck inside of a tire fire in the middle of a shit storm.

My least favorite part is that Jimmy Clausen is probably in the top 15.

Cutler blows. I say that as someone who has watched the Bears since the late 70s, who thought the Denver trade was a good move, and who thought the contract extension was a worthwhile gamble after the offense looked so good last season. But at this point I can't see him as anything other than Rex Grossman with a…

+1 fist mumps

A Klinkhammer is also a move that Werner Klemperer used to perform on Bob Crane's home movies.

Chris Conte: Man, I love this game. All these people, the lights, the excitement. Who cares about the effects? I'm not going to suffer from that stuff for years.

Agreed. The Robert Wexler "I enjoy cocaine" segment is in the pantheon of all-time great bits. I am also amazed the show was able to keep that segment so hilarious and often subversive even after representatives were trying to use it to look cool to constituents.