Elizabeth Eilender, an attorney who represented plaintiffs Christina Scavo and Shannon O'Toole, would only tell us via email that "the Case is resolved and it is being discontinued with prejudice."

That's one way to get some runs.

Next, Bill Simmons discusses why Germany will never again win a World Cup because every yellow card reminds the fans of the yellow Star of David.

Really well said. The thing is, he is still good when he doesn't try too hard. I always enjoy the NBA trade columns, for instance, because there's a genuine sense of excitement in his writing as well as a lot of humor.

Also, all gold medalists at the Russia games will receive a free pair of American blue jeans and a glowing piece of a meteor.

"With 13-15 committee members present at the interviews, and with each member needing to be given the opportunity to ask their own questions, and with Julie's interview starting more than 15 minutes late, there was little or no time to ask follow-up questions, or probe deeply...."

"You know, Smithers, when I was a young buck, my patented fadeaway pitch was compared by many to the 'Trouble Ball' of the late, great Satchel Page."

When I saw the missed shot clock call against the Pacers, I really thought the fix was in to put the Heat in the finals. Thankfully the rash of mindless, random officiating incompetence that followed restored my faith in the integrity of the game.

I cannot stand the Heat, but how could anyone watch the second half and think the refs were calling it the Heat's way? The shot clock violation call was terrible against the Pacers, but LeBron's elbow foul at the end of the third and his ridiculous sixth foul on a touch flop were pretty absurd.

Q: What do you tell a female Rutgers Athletic Director with two black eyes?

So, using the Louis CK version of the BMI, it would take two Stedman Baileys and a fat baby to equal Terrell Brown.

The Marlins immediately made a trade inquiry on that guy.

It seems like the harsher penalty would be mandatory attendance at Royals games for three years.

I was going to apply until I saw they required a dong pic on the application.

It's not surprising. People from Cleveland have a tendency to remain hidden in plain sight.

Oh, to be rich enough to buy billboard space for some of these in Miami....

I started throwing up, constant diarrhea.

That is out of the park and into the stadium lights.

Worst penalty box ever.

Not one "poppycock" or "balderdash" in those tweets. Oh, how the standards have fallen in the Ivy League.