@RonHarperForMVP: Simpsons quotes: is there anything they can't do?

The story takes a tragic turn when Beth plays a hunch and takes the Washington Generals for 100 grand.

@norbizness: I hear Jonah Goldberg is interested in playing Dink.

@The_Night_Man_Cometh: "SANITIZE HIM!" the crowd shouted.

@AngryChiefsFan: I find that hard to believe when they didn't even use live actors.

@whiskerbrisket: Exactly. It'll say something like "Dark ladies crave white meat." Does that mean it's set in a deli? Why should I have to guess when I'm paying $9.99.

@formerly Chief Wahoo: I see why the ruling was made, but I think you could make a case that he did have possession within the context of the rule. It's not like he touched both feet and then the ball hit the ground. He gets his other arm and both ass cheeks in the endzone before rolling over. And he had possession —…

Lions fan has already been boycotting professional football by watching the Lions.

@H to the IZZO: They don't have to pay Obama. Public officials are in the public domain so his likeness can be used.

@Leak Plugger: True, but the difference between Drew and Bill Simmons is that Drew doesn't spend 5000 words trying to tell you why his picks are right. He's more interested in setting up Nazi Shark and Robert Evans. Which is why I read Drew's NFL stuff and not Simmons'.

@vodkanaut: I'm still riding my Dexter McCluster high. "OMG, Yahoo has him at rb AND wr! Soon I will be invincible!"

Keeper leagues are a good cure for the late-round fantasy blahs. You get the boring C-list material out of the way in the middle rounds and then get to enjoy the illusion that you are securing the next Chris Johnson in the coming years, even if you will likely be dropping those guys as soon as they tear their…

I'd like to believe that the Bears will go 9-7 and make the playoffs. I'd also like to believe that those pills advertised on Spike will make me girthier.

@ClintonPortishead: I'd like it better if he was frozen in carbonite for Jabba's pleasure.

@AzureTexan: ANTONIO CROMARTIE

But Salisbury is in

Remember, future directors, fight scenes look much better when you work out the blocking before filming.

@Deadp00l: It's a trick question. The answer is c) all of them.

Those are much better than Mike Ditka's commercials for Mike Ditka Power Footbal, where he screamed at you for 30 seconds about being an idiot and then benched you for Player 2.

I am drawn to flattery like Whitlock to butter.