You fell down, went boom on camera.

Daaaamn, dude! All I did was eat shit after a local news lady asked us some pandering questions while we were out running in the snow. Didn't realize my on-camera awkwardness and subsequent spill warranted such an epically fucked up fate. Can't imagine what's in store for anyone who actually takes themselves (or…

Wow. I would be infuriated if someone picked me up without my permission. I am 5'2" and even when I was a size 6 I don't think anybody ever just tried to pick me up. I don't even particularly like to be touched by people I don't know well.

I'm 5' and this is true, especially when people pick me up. >_> I tend to panic. Even if it's just my husband being cute, I instantly become terrified. I'm also pretty wary of people in general, but that may be a mixture of my height and the fact that I tend to surround myself with weirdos.

Back when I was in school, my college had a frat that made head lines for throwing an MLK Day party in blackface.

Other racists will give them jobs, don't worry.

I find nothing glamorous about designer dogs. Mutts are smarter, cuter and generally healthier.

My mutt was the best dog in the world, and 10+ years later, I still can't bring myself to replace him.

Because nobody has yet, I would like to take the opportunity to advocate for people adopting regular, run-of-the-mill shelter pup mutts. There are lots of great animals out there—one for everyone I'm sure—and you can visit with them at the local animal control place and pick one that you get along with best. They…

Shines comments aren't very informative. She just says "Don't get one! They're bad!" Bad how? What specifically are the traits that Shibas have, that are different from other breeds, that are difficult to deal with? Frankly, spending "thousands of dollars repairing the damage your puppy has done" applies to just about…

I'd much rather get drunk with Tina and Amy than Taylor...

lol I hate Taylor Swift. As a public persona. Maybe she's cool IRL who fucking knows. But. Kanye was right, you know? And Fey and Poehler are comedy goddesses. So whatever. pfft.

Damn! Does that mean I'm fooling no one?

Ok, so I'm probably a horrible person, and you're all going to hate me for admitting this.... but when my 5-year-old daughter lets me, I tweeze the middle of her unibrow a bit.

Takeaway: WHITE.

The transformation is complete, young Bieber is worthy of the iron throne.

Let me guess: These classes are taught by men

Needs more Blerta.

if I was wearing a fancy dress, this be me