HOLY SHIT DUDE I JUST GOT TICKETS TO THE SPONGEBOB MOVIE PREMIERE WANNA GO?

Eyebrows are fickle. They won't grow back.

"No one has thin eyelashes in Iran, but if you do, it's stressful for everyone."

How could you forget this classic.

Watching Taylor Swift swear brings me an unbelievable level of joy.

It all went down hill after women started wearing pants. It goes pants, voting rights, profanity.

God's nightgown! I spit upon the mewling elf-skinned GOP. Mike Hucksbee is a craven horn-beast foot-licker if ever I saw one.

You have to understand in Mike Huckabee's world Ladies' mouths should only be used for sweet pecks on the cheek, tasting their cooking and occasionally singing songs about other ladies who they hope won't steal their man.

Eh, this means about as much as the pope's "actions" on gay people. Yeah, there's some mushy, nebulous concept that this "moves the conversation forward", but in real-world terms this means nothing. They've basically said, "we think gays and lesbians shouldn't be discriminated against unless someone reallllly feels…

remember when people lost their shit about kendall jenner vacationing in saudi or dubai? this is what they should pay attention to

"Tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699."

Omg, michelle's dress is the beeeeest! Also the expression on her face? Perfect!

And then he flew to Saudi Arabia, where these things need to be said but never will be.

The theme for this years Republic Day Parade was woman empowerment! (nari shakti)

The network people must ask about virginity status in your Bachelor application. I expect they deliberately cast these women to add drama. Gross. Also, I bet 100% it's not a question that men get asked to be on the Bachelorette.

Do you know what kind of people have an unhealthy obsession with other peoples sex lives? Looooooooooosers, maybe even bigger losers than the virgin. The fact that this is even considered newsworthy is quite telling.