I can't remember the comedian who said this or I'd credit him: "It doesn't melt... it decomposes." I think he was talking about fake butter, but same difference.

I've heard (I forget where) that the 1/2 and 1/2 is called a "Mason-Dixon. I thought that was pretty cute!

To be honest, I "sweeten" my unsweet tea with sweet tea when I'm at Zaxby's or Moe's or whatever- straight sweet tea is TOO sweet for me. When we make it at home, we use simple syrup, but I still think it blends better when it's still hot. It's probably all in my head.

I suspect it originated with the tea companies. The first I ever heard of it was in a Lipton ad ('7o's, maybe?), enticing consumers to make "sun tea". I'm guessing they were losing market share to soft drinks and wanted to make their product almost as easy as popping open a can.

I am very snobby about iced tea, probably because of the whole southerner thing. Sun tea has always struck me as the laziest thing in the world, and I don't know how it would taste good at all (you have to have BOILING water to make tea!). I figured everyone would have wised up after 30 Rock.

I saw the Indigo Girls live for the first time this past Friday night and it was AWESOME! I knew a few of their songs, but I was impressed with the depth of the lyrics across the board. They can sound oh-so-earnest and serious, but have a lot of fun, too. It's like I've found a new favorite (twenty-year-old) band!

When she snaps, she'll snap big. You should check out "Poser" by Claire Dederer- there's a "perfect" mom in there who snaps, and just reading it made me feel better!

I'm pretty much convinced (after two kids and lots of friends-with-kids) that lots of supposedly ideal child behavior is just dumb luck. Some kids will shape up if you start to count to three (my oldest), some kids will ignore every threat in the book and scream their heads off when you actually follow through on your…

I think there was a Desmond Morris documentary demonstrating that primate babies actually physically resemble their father more in the first year of life specifically to reinforce paternal bonding that otherwise might not happen (and therefore reduce the child's likelihood of survival).

The father "giving" a baby his last name has been, traditionally, an acknowledgement of paternity. Because, as you say, maternity is never really questioned! But before DNA testing, it more or less came down to whether the man would allow a child (outside of marriage) to use his surname. It all boiled down to…

Ugh. My stomach lurched when I read that bit about the world having a "moral obligation" to protect the scene. So, he wants NATO to go in or something? Yikes.

"I am smiling."

Someone once said that having a kid is the ultimate act of optimism, and I guess I agree with that to an extent. I mean, think about it: the best case scenario is that they grow up, don't need you any more, and you die. That's the win: that they go on without you.

I recommend a super sweet letter just loaded with passive-aggressive "advice".

He's pretty "special," too.

I'm glad to hear that your whole group had a good time! This guy was an idiot about it, but if you're asking for something mere mortals simply pay for (what a concept!), I guess the club is looking for some kind of benefit.

I am imagining her skull collapsing inward as she tries to process the utter impossibility of your statement.

It has a pretty oily texture though, doesn't it? I like it just fine (especially in coffee), but I'm not sure I can pull off a switch with the kids.

I've been listening to the soundtrack to "The Piano" in the car lately, and it reminds me of what an extraordinary performance Anna Paquin gave in that film. I'd never seen ( and have rarely seen since) a film and an actress that captured so well the combination of innocence and bitchiness a little girl can exude.

"Life in the Dream House" is already taken for the current Barbie cartoon, alas. Pretty sure the cartoon dolls are funnier and more charming than all these folks.