Can we set up a Go Fund Me page for the torture you had to endure at CPAC? I feel like a large compensation is in order.

Are you still mad because they’re remaking The Princess Bride?

Whenever I see Meisha Tate’s name, all I can picture is Jar Jar Binks talking about that space between his balls and his asshole.

Seriously, how did Andre do it? The Texans lack of QB alone, make Johnson one of the best WR’s of all time. Just imagine if he had even a semi-decent QB throwing him passes?

My sister worked at a pub in Madison, where for the last several years, all of the UW coaches would put on their radio shows: Football, basketball, hockey. She said all were pricks, except Bo Ryan. She said he was the only one that didn’t rant, rave and act like a rock star diva. Interesting side-note, she said that…

Your name is Jackie Jormp Jomp. My fav 30 Rock reference. I don’t know who you are, internet stranger, but I love you.

For me, it was this quote that affirmed she did not grow up in THAT Brooklyn. “in reality I was just a tired Mom in an Uber with my drapey cardigan tied around my waist”

Right?!?! Oh the cliched “promising young man” bullshit. Is the fact that he was good at sportsing part of the story? Sure. Throw it in the story and give it a couple sentences, maybe even a paragraph. Then devote the rest of the fucking article to the lives of the victims that he has ruined, devastated, and forever…

Alright, as an avid USWNT supporter and watcher, I am going to stop my hatin’ and get onboard with he men’s team. Is that Freddy Adu kid still around?

As someone who is rabidly pro-choice, I love hearing women share stories of abortions and almost abortions. The more we share these experiences of why we choose to have or not have an abortion, the more the myths and stereotypes of abortion will become shattered. I personally wouldn’t choose to have an abortion, but I…

An Olympic? A Rio?

A group of geese is a gaggle. A group of dogs is a pack. A group of ants is an army. A group of deer is a herd. What is a group of tapeworms?

I have owned a couple dozen crappy cars in my day, but hands down the best crappy car I have ever owned was my 2004 Pontiac Vibe. I bought from an old guy in Phoenix, AZ when it was six years old and only had 55,000 miles on it. It had faded paint from the desert heat and a large dent in the front panel, none of which…

Yeahhhhhhh, me thinks the kid will be on the jazz hands team or the Mathletes. Anything but football. So long sport I fucking love. I will miss you, but this shit is down right awful.

A++ Kinja

The whole game I kept shouting, “Get that fancy dog!” at the TV. At one point my wife walks into the room and says, “What the fuck does that even mean?” I suppose without context, it would seem strange.

Yes. A thousand yes’s. His stat line should read, 4 INT’s 2 lost fumbles and 5 passes that were sooooooo close to INT’s.

4419 Days of Kristin?

If there are any fellow feds here, know that Planned Parenthood is an org that your CFC (Combined Federal Campaign) contribution can go towards. I have $15 taken out of every pay check that goes to PP. It’s the least I can do for what they did for me when I was younger.