P.E.B.S.A.C.

Average. The four of you should be quite happy living in there for a bit while you build your new dream home with whatever’s left over!

“Sitting on the Pooped” was Irving Berlin’s little-known first draft of “Puttin’ on the Ritz.”

FYI, your dad is a fucking idiot.

The original Mega Man - and I say this as someone who experienced it as a fresh release - was never any good, and deserved maybe one sequel to fix things (back then, mind you, games didn’t normally qualify for sequels if they were shit.. which Mega Man actually was).

The Victorians And Their Travelling Tents Were All Stupid, and Everything They Ever Did Was Also Mostly Stupid.

Hey! That dick is *MR.* Outdated and not Relevant to you!

“Trump is doing the same thing Obama did when he enacted DACA, trying to circumvent law through executive orders.”

That said, if you feel like you’re wasting energy, give yourself boundaries. Set a limit. Pick a number that feels right to you: Maybe you push back just once a day? Once a week? Perhaps you post no more than three explainers?

That thing is crying out for some hot-glued googly eyes RIGHT NOW! The bigger the better.

“OMG, Becky, lookit! It’s Left Shark and Rocket Man!! OMG they’re like, totally so cool!”

Old guy here. When you grow up, you realize why Volvos make so much goddamn sense on so many goddamn levels, even though you’re going to spend some coin to own one.**

Then, after a certain amount of consecutive “why” questions (in my experience, the average is about six), he’ll either realize he doesn’t really know what he’s talking about (rare) or he’ll get frustrated and annoyed and go away (common).

It’s that her stupid earrings make her look like she has Frankenstein bolts.

The bible needs to clear this shit up. How am I supposed to want to go somewhere that isn’t specifically clear about any of the things that matter?

I’d pull the pin on a something like that in a heartbeat. Hell, just this weekend, I was at a cottage and decided that would be the time to update the Nav software on my V60CC - an update the car told me was going to take an hour and a half. That meant I had to continuously come back to check that the car hadn’t…

Oh, just shut up, you tiresome, tedious bore. SHUT. UP. Use all your newfound free-time to learn how to spell (yes, it does matter; shut up about that, too).

That’s one of the best looking cars I’ve seen in years. YEARS!!

I’m guessing Cruz’s favourite porn involves a step-mother fingering herself after walking in on her step-daughter getting fucked from behind on a white leather sofa.