It's the only major sport where you can't run out of bounds. The fighting is a leveler for teams to protect their star players. Plus, it give people something to talk about around the water cooler the next morning.

Does Google say anything about face paint, feather boas, and blind referees?

Things that will Make you a Goddammed Hero.

People with shitty asses, and no common sense.

How about Shorty the Sniper? or Oscar the Steenkamp Roller?

I got it. +1

Yes, the first day of testimony left him down in the stumps, er dumps.

Suffer the little children.

He trapped him between his chins and pummeled him with a man purse.

Oh look. It's the new Action Figure - Amish Lebron.

Obviously authentic.

Beware the Emperor's new clothes.

Mark Cuban says the NFL is going to implode. Six hours later, old Ralph shuffles off this mortal coil. Coincidence? I think not!

He's going to need a date with a big fucking mouth.

No Hokey Pokey for him for a while.

Martin will fit in Northern California. They have good whine there.

We'll up our empathy. Up yours.

Insert Penalty Box joke here.

That's going to be a bitch to shave.

And then they asked him about his helmet.