Joke’s on you, John Brown—my girlfriend is also a fantasy!

BarfRocket out here BODYING motherfuckers.

Tibor the Armenian intern.

Have you ever seen Snowden and Scissorhands in the same place tho.

Was there food, that you could eat? Good wedding.

You really did just think up a t-shirt Aaron Rodgers should wear.

This guy is Houdini with a howitzer.

How much money do each of you make in a year, before taxes?

Lambchop is the only thing I hate more than clowns.

dammit

2. when these showed up in Deadspin’s chatroom, someone at the office shouted, “YOOOOOO, THUMB DEAD?

Everybody’s a film critic these days (except for Jason Pierre-Paul).

I’m sorry, how can we know for sure that Beijing has already “won” the 2022 Games? Their aerial skiers haven’t even been born yet!

Beckman’s

Fettysburg Address

“lol Kobe calls 17/38 a prtty good nite haha” - every god damn comment

Pixels is more like a classical drama than a mere “movie.”