All of our shots are contested.

Ten bucks the Sixers draft an actual tank this year

That Boateng fall isn’t so much a loss of balance at it is a loss of faith in the fairness of the world. It looked like his entire lifeforce was suddenly run over by a bus.

Jerome Boateng: September 3, 1988—May 6, 2015

Fuck you, Garrett.

"Like what kind?" I mumbled, teenly.

"You know, just once in this lifetime, I would like my favorite team to acquire a legendary skill position player who does NOT turn out to be a complete fucking shithead."

You don't say!

Rawlings should tell Jerry Jones that as long as Hardy remains on the roster, the Cowboys cannot play a single game in his city.

I mean, if I had to guess what state any of these colleges are in, I'd say Longwood is excited.

Oh, my bad.

When people say "you're cool," do you immediately check your body temperature or nah?

Oh, my bad.

You act like I work someplace where I can't say whatever I want about anything at any time.

A few thoughts:

The fact that the dumb white guy's last name was "Ferguson" pretty much proves that the universe has an inherent drive towards irony.

let's all go to starbucks to discuss this further.

For god only knows what reason, I flipped to CNN for the first time in forever and all I hear is Trinidad James say something like "If I call you my nigga, you my nigga!" It was so perfect.