Well, the terrorist attack on Nakatomi Plaza in 1988 hasn't ruined Christmas Eve.

Two part question:

Titus Young disagrees about fucking up in your twenties.

Sex with a woman works for me.

The stadium matters. If you are going to Coors Field or Tiger Stadium, they have a ton of things to entertain kids, like batting cages, playscapes, meeting times with mascots, etc. If you are going to Fenway or Wrigley, there is nothing for them to do. I bought my kid (4 at the time) a large snow cone in a cup at…

I'll admit I still watch ESPN News because it actually shows highlights. I will never understand why ESPN thinks I should watch a 5 minute monologue from any of the horses from their stable of washed up athletes.

That GIF fits perfectly with the squelching noises my windshield wipers make.

"That's Scott. He's a dick."

I am pretty sure Eli Manning took this picture with his iPhone.

Asgardian pussy is the best pussy. And you (as Thor) are a God, so you could probably parlay that into other stuff.

If you could be any of the Avengers, who would you choose? I would go 1. Thor, 2. Captain America, 3. Iron Man, 4. Hawkeye, 5. Hulk, 6. Black Widow.

You've got to go with Jeter.

Mark Schlereth used to piss himself on the field all of the time, hence the nickname "Stink". But I would assume this is limited to the mongoloids of the NFL.

You probably shouldn't call someone "retarted" if you can't spell retarded. Congratulations on your state championship, though. SAN DIMAS HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL RULES!!1!1

The City of Brotherly Love, of course.

Chicago is pretty segregated by neighborhood.

That is one of many times I have been embarrassed to be a Bear fan. As noted above, holy shit Bear fans can be insufferable.

Wait, what? That is stupid. He is good at throwing a football for the team I root for. Fuck yeah, I root for him. Athletes are assholes all of the time. Fuck, Ray Lewis was an accessory to murder and he is one of Baltimore's most popular athletes. Cutler sat out a game when he tore up his MCL and was pissed…

The White Sox and their fans are overlooked once again. Ha-ha.

The onion figured this one out 13 years ago: http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-study-finds-college-binge-drinking-to-be-a-bla,763/