And why is a selfie appropriate for a political statement? Weird!

Oh, Madonna, please stop it. You are fifty-six years old and still very attractive, but how many contortions did it take for that shot? You do not look like that now, which is fine: take that information and live with it. Be who you are, woman.

The solution is to arm the cat.

I mean he's being a hypocrite.

It's the chest waxing that I find most offensive. He's a cute guy with or without a beard, but he had really nice chest hair and it's a shame that they got rid of it for the movie. I think that all variants of chest hair are nice, a lot of times guys look a bit like shaved cats without it.

I don't even look like any of those women. the closest is the second photo, middle row second in from the left. now I feel abnormal because my flappy bits - such as they are - are neatly tucked inside what I am assuming is a very fat Labia Majora... I'm confused. :/

That would be pretty Capitol-y, to airbrush the fuck out of her!

It depends on the designer. A Balenciaga vagina would be sleek and trendy. A De La Renta vagina is timeless and classic. A Betsey Johnson vagina says "hey, I like to party". And a Chanel vagina says nothing. It just smokes cigarettes and judges penises for being too fat.

I'll never stop rooting for Kim and Kanye to make it.

On the throne of the largest empire in human history?

I love that they get him to quote Shakespeares' 'Richard II' - there's something perfect about him reciting Shakespeare...

Are we sure they aren't just trying to prevent the baby boom which will ostensibly occur when this commercial gets the entire internet pregnant?

That's awesome for you and yay for having such a comfortable relationship with your body! However, not everyone feels that way. Unfortunately, we can't just wave a magic wand all over human beings and say "OK YOU LOVE BEING SEEN NAKED NOW." For most people, being naked is probably when they are at their most…

Somewhat related.

The more bored teens we have with nothing better to do than run amok and fuck shit up, the sooner we can be done with this failed experiment called human civilization.

Yeah, except now they're teaching you that you better really enjoy the four-or-so years you spend hitting the books, 'cause afterwards you're going to be right back at that shitty job. Minus 4 years of incremental raises and a promotion to night shift manager.

Is it the pushing someone out the window thing?

I love that he can sing! The scene in High Fidelity when he's singing "Let's Get it On" is one of my favorite musical moments in film.

So got all your buddies on 4chan and reddit to star you? Nice work!

I find myself incredibly frustrated with Jezebel's response to this story. Just as you rightfully call out people who commit rape (proven cases) you should call out assholes like Faircloth in this situation. Be outraged! This is a disgusting act that makes it more and more impossible for people actually raped to be…