Oh no, you are quite mistaken. Sooner or later, every adult hits the age where they simply stop giving a shit what other people think and discover the joy of doing shit by your damn self. I went to my first movie alone this spring and I enjoyed it so much more than any other viewing experience I've ever had. 1 in the…

The Favre pics aren't the only celebrity nudes Gawker Media has posted either, not by a longshot. Their hands aren't clean in that regard at all.

Yes.

Aw, did your stupid pun fail to be funny? Did your one-off, obvious stupid retarded one week late dumb fucking joke not elicit the "yeah bro LOL" response that you wanted? Which would you rather me make fun of: the fact that it took you four days to post that obvious joke and you still think it's cutting edge, or…

Do you often find yourself bewildered by the things that horrify normal people?

Right, so you're not even denying that you're talking out of your ass. Here's a clue dipshit: you have to claim everything you make on credit card tips. Since most people don't pay with cash anymore, you're claiming pretty much everything. Most corporate places even have it set up so you have to claim 10% of your…

Where the fuck are you getting that it's tax free? Servers have to claim tips and a $6 paycheck after taxes is considered good. When I used to wait tables a $0 check was not unusual at all.

Yeah, because everyone in the business knows people are lining up out of the door to get a burger at 3 in the afternoon on a Monday. Hell, restaurants plan their purchasing months in advance based on what they expect to do on Monday afternoons. Fuck Saturday night, 3 in the afternoon on Monday is where the real money…

Peter King: Did you hear about Ray Rice?

Which Deadspin writer has the messiest apartment?

Skipping over Rothstein's demise pretty much kills any interest I have in watching the last season. He's been the most interesting character throughout the show's run and having him killed off-screen feels like cheating the audience.

They even manage to fuck you over when you root against them. During the 0-16 season I openly rooted against them just to piss off all the steak-heads at work and had a blast doing it. But then they tricked me in 2011 and I was actually dumb enough to buy into the hope that they were finally good enough to root for.…

"He took the wind?" should be emblazoned on that motherfuckers tombstone.

The Lomas Brown thing still makes me chuckle out loud.

It's so true. Listening to the assholes who call into Valenti and Foster every August predicting a 12-4 season and a Super Bowl win is actually fun for me now, even somewhat cathartic. The only way to win as a Lions fan is to point and laugh at other Lions fans who earnestly believe the Lions are going to be any good.

It's the dick. The lions kicked him in the dick.

I'm sure you get that look from other Lions fans as well. I've been a Lions fan my whole life too and whenever I see someone wearing a jersey outside of a game all I can think is "why the fuck is he wearing that?"

Wisconsin is where everyone in America's weird evangelical Christian cousins live. Everyone in America fucking hates it when their cousins from Wisconsin come to town for a visit.

It's still highly improbable. Over the eons, trillions of things had to go exactly right to produce us. One small variation billions of years ago and we wouldn't exist at all, and there's still 2 billion years of evolution on earth after that for things to all go wrong. We evolved on one straight line and in that…

Paramour sounds like the most dignified option. I'm using that next time I shack up.