Hey, I’ve dreamed of the day that I own my own rocking chair since I was a teen. Now either that means that rocking chairs are great, or I’ve been too old for this shit for far too long.

Luke, hand over your gamer card. Opening any article with “Duke Nukem 3D has not aged well” is a damn war crime.

Modern re-releases over the last 10+ years have long since resolved that, as have source ports. Unless you’re allergic to sprites, there’s nothing to complain about. This game has aged like a fine wine, and it’s such a shame that Duke Nukem Forever aged like yogurt sitting in the sun.

I remember having Burger King tacos, what, 15 years ago? They were ok, but I could find a Jack in the Box right down the road, and their cheap, trash tacos were better. At the time, the BK tacos were being sold for slightly more as well, so you’d better believe I wasn’t planning on trying them a second time.

I finally beat the game last year. My problem wasn’t that it was too scary, it was that it was kind of boring. I must have restarted the game about a dozen times over the years, and on a handful of different copies. It just always fell apart after a few hours, and I would lose interest. Having finally finished it, I…

Boy, did McDonald’s ever screw up by giving the general public something with people on them! Of course we’re gonna make it look like they’re boning! Look at Land O’Lakes! Man, I bet these folks are embarrassed by this blunder that’s all their fault and not the result of people being people.

Okay, well, good luck.

Say that to my face, EA.

I mean, I still think that this is a good song. Rad, even. Papa Roach may not be the most marketable in this day and age, but it’s not like they didn’t have anything to offer.

I was a little too young to see it happen for myself, but the aftermath lasted long enough that I certainly knew about it before it was overshadowed by some other media scandal.

I’m conflicted. I do think that the intentional lies about who she is are pretty awful, and she deserves criticism for the scam, but I also see nothing wrong with a person of any age being successful in this medium. Maybe the reveal is a silver lining of some sort, and opens the door to a more honest interaction with…

God, I miss Board the Platforms and Break the Targets. I remember making custom BtP stages when the stage builder was first introduced.

Microtransactions usually don’t work on me. If I can get enjoyment from a game, I’ll play it. I don’t need weapon skins and character emotes; I’m perfectly fine playing the game I paid for without giving in to the nickel-and-dime scams. If your games can’t hold up without it, then you won’t have me playing your game.…

I don’t think it looks that bad. Of course, everything looked like that back then, so my perspective might be altered.

I think “ok” is the best description of it. I recently replayed it, and while it’s better than I remembered, it’s not exactly a timeless classic. Considering how far it strayed from the originals (and comparing it to the much superior Half-Life 2 from the year before), it just didn’t manage to meet expectations. But…

Duh? I mean, anonymity makes assholes out of most people. I think a better study would be how many people are affected by such harassment. Personally, I just mute people or ignore the chat boxes. I don’t really care what people are saying; I’m just here to play a game and have a good time.

So somebody at Blizzard has a foot fetish. There’s also a new Quentin Tarantino film coming out.

Is there something wrong with his mouth? Being a poor performer is fine; that’s not his job. I’m concerned about his inability to speak.

This is accurate. Cats are immune to fall damage, which is a pretty OP passive. I’d also like to point out that PETA stated that she’s “using the platform to post animal abuse”, which is pretty terrible wording. Was the animal mistreated? Sure, but I don’t fully agree with this being animal “abuse”. She picked it up…