Also not facing charges? Andray Blatche.

Nice.

Hey, this is my dinner cardboard, dick!

Yeah, I made that comment before the other two voicemails had been added to the post. D'oh.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Miami-Dade County...

Holy Christ, Leo's story is perhaps the most harrowing thing I've ever read.

Have I completely lost my mind, or does "Lennay" from the voicemails sound more than a little bit like Manti's mom?

No soap, buddy. I have FiOS, and am on the east coast. Instead I am breaking the law like some kind of outlaw badass type.

OK, I found an illegal stream. How is this streaming online if it's not on TV yet? I am vexed. I am very vexed.

Where are people watching this? ABC affiliate in my area says it's not on until 4pm and I am LOSING MY FUCKING MIND HERE

This is probably a stupid question, but is there ever a point in any of the voicemails when the caller identifies him/herself as Lennay? Or is it inconceivable that Manti Te'o, one of the most famous college athletes in the country and someone who has acknowledged seeing other people during his relationship with…

Yeah, the political press is compromised by its need for access, sure. But they also have a power they (rarely use) can leverage against political players: if you won't give me the story, someone else will who might not tell it the way you like, or, you had better tell me the truth, because someone else might if you…

The profit motive of all news organizations is not remotely analogous to being the actual, contractual promoter and broadcaster of the exact same businesses you purport to cover, and it's disingenuous as all get-out to pretend otherwise. ESPN butters its bread with the actual broadcasting of sporting events, so all…

They're hopelessly compromised by their role as a business partner to the sports they're ostensibly covering. Hopelessly.

In a related story, officials with the Federal Bureau of Investigation are continuing to pursue the notorious digital penetrator known only as "Tommy from the magazine."

This is wonderful. +1

I can't claim to know the answer to the mystery of Jerry Rice's late-career production, but I do know that whatever it is, it definitely isn't, "Let's roll a stick of butter in molasses and eat it like a candy bar," SO YOU CAN STOP SAYING THAT NOW JASON WHITLOCK JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

I'm currently in love with the idea, as expressed by a complete fucking dunce whose reply to my earlier comment I summarily dismissed, that Te'o is an innocent "hopeless romantic," and that this explains his naivete. Yeah, he's a regular fuckin' Romeo, that Manti. Why, when he learned that the great love of his life…

We're in uncharted territory here, folks. At this point, claiming to believe Te'o's story is more insulting to him than saying he's a damn liar.

OK, but I'm gonna take a wild guess that you'd EVER MET HIM BEFORE, right?