Titanic Goes to Hell: The Final Sailing would be one heck of an Asylum joint.

It’s too bad that social media wasn’t around back then so everyone could post pictures of themselves aerobicizing. “Just got my new big-ass legwarmers y’all! #AerobicLife #GetToStepping”

All my love and support to you, friend. Here’s me in the same boat on April 14th, the morning of. This selfie is probably my most prized possession.

Ok, I like this post but your comment is fantastic!

I drank a shit ton of port last night.

I’m pretty sure there is historical documentation supporting that that is exactly what happened.

ice cold

this take is so hot it's cold

Well, they were going to the bottom of the ocean, and that’s really the core problem right there. They should have been going to a port instead.

That’s a fair point.

I feel like the choices just get worse after they hit the iceberg. Why didn’t they just not sink? Salt water makes everything buoyant and for fuck’s sake, that’s a BOAT. What’s more buoyant than that? I feel like they weren’t even trying to get to America or wherever they were going.

OMG please ask me! I’ll insist your kid stop looking so shitty cuz it’ll just take a second, tell everyone to say MONEYYYY!!!!! like a doofus, and frame the shot without all of that weird headspace people (like my dad *cough*) leave. I love taking strangers’ pictures, I just realized that.

This is so practical. Of course men were in charge so it didn’t work out that way. Pretty sure they saw the iceberg and were like “THIS IS THE TITANIC WE DON’T NEED TO MOVE IT WILL GET OUT OF OUR WAY.”

No shit, bro. A blogger writing about people who are insufferable. That’s like a lead singer complaining about jehova witnesses.

Wait, no. This is the saddest thing ever

Clearly not all selfies are created equal. (Hugs)

Counterpoint: me and my doggy who is going to cross the old rainbow bridge in 3.5 hours. :/

relevant:

The fact that the header progressed over the course of the week is a spectacular attention to detail that should earn one of you a raise.