His father is on the council. He did this as a prank to make his father laugh and it went viral. 

Don’t they? The real mystery is how do they shrink them before they get to the table?

They’re definitely not wings at that point, but some of us like battered and deep fried chunks of boneless chicken covered in sauce :P

The only way out of this mess is through it. Steer into it. Make an entire series of beers labeled with various cultures’ words for pubes. Sell each sixer with a merkin beer koozie. 

oo anyone like the dessert pizzas they used to have? they were basically jam tarts i was really into them

Just be smart about it.

Is there such a thing as a too-dirty martini? At 7:15am, yes, probably. At 7:15pm, not a chance.

The one thing i want is one intro were the joker talk about having two oscars to johnny cage

That wine episode was awesome, because it was a rare chance for Aramaki to be a main character in the action (we even got to meet his old flame).

The old series had an episode on wine fraud. I still don’t really believe it.

I’m very fond of that episode.

Because of the quarantine, there’s less pollution and the commas are returning to their natural habitats.

As a gigantic fan of Stand Alone Complex, it’s slightly reassuring to know that this new version is worth skipping. Moving the entire gang to California after an apocalypse feels strangely more like a premise of Archer than it does a story in the world of Ghost in the Shell.

Hey baby, I hear the blues a-callin’, tossed salad, and scrambled, eggs!

My God! The Oxford Comma’s jumped species! We’ve all, got it!

This recipe here is definitely not what people are basing their dislike of cholent on! To get a better idea, imagine your grandparents dumping a bunch of canned vegetables and beans in with whatever meat was available, adding little to no seasoning because that’s not a thing that was understood in their time, and then…

Fuck it, I love Guy Fieri. Yes, he looks like he gargles Mountain Dew instead of brushing, but the stuff on DD&D is great, and I’ve found some excellent local joints because of it. I was thrilled when he won The Next Food Network Star, and I ate at Johnny Garlic’s way back when he was still involved with it, and it…

Maybe you should stop writing compliments -- you’re bad at it.

“French onion soup pizza”?! The F is wrong with people? Pizza is already the best form of food. It’s Pizza! It’s perfect!
Fruit Pizza: Do you have pears, grapes, apples, or pineapple on hand?
WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING???

lol, that was me too, leftover pizza is tomorrow’s breakfast.

You’re missing such an obvious answer.  This place is a time-travel hub.  It needs to remain as-is and in the same place so that time-travelers have an anchor to their time.  Duh.