NFL Minion: Thank you for calling us about this before going to the police. You obviously appreciate the sensitivity of the situation.

Did you just call Balotelli a "Chill-ass animal," Marchman? I thought that's what we were trying to get away from.

+1

Pelini: It is out of control. And here at Nebraska we keep everything under control. YOU HEAR ME? We let NOTHING get OUT OF CONTROL.

+1

+1

Well maybe if you'd clean up the remnants of a middle-eastern picnic you've got trailing behind you, Kimiko, you wouldn't get bees chasing you.

"Little Girl Gives No Shits About Strasbourg's Warm-Up," is the most sloppily composed article about Eva Braun's reaction to the annexation of Alsace that I've ever read.

The contrast between the two singers shows us how much difference high-end gear can make. In this case, the Beyta 87 is obviously better than the SMDH-58.

While people are going to make fun of Dong Wan Sin's name, it's really just a Koreanization of a name his parents unfortunately perceived as predictive of future success in the Anglo-Ivy League milieu: John J. Daterape.

If you hit one of his teammates in the forehead, you better believe you're going to get some serious jawing from Peyton.

I know all you fucking hipsters love The Wire, but for God's sake, can we please go back to spelling it 'Baltimore?'

goddammit +1

+1

+1 That's solid.

Demotion to minors? Sheeit. If she's more than six months past her eighteenth birthday, Bryce Harper isn't going near it.

+1

Stats like usage rate can be exceedingly dangerous. Players see a low rate and decide they've got to get their hands on the rock more. Just ask Lamar Odom.

+1 Finest fuckin' kind.

They cut off the FML transaction section that shows my monthly trade of $700.00 to Sallie Mae in exchange for one tiny sliver of my soul.