Looking like your dad only explains part of the self-loathing.

I still remember Jimmy the Cabdriver’s take on it. . .”Cochise!”

Um, can you say “spread” again? . .and again? and then another couple thousand times? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Thanks.

I remember watching The Violent Femmes episode when it was aired the first time. I’ve said it here before, and I still mean it. I think that’s my favorite half hour of tv ever. I’m a big V.F. fan. I like the new show, saw the first couple episodes. I miss the cuteness of the original, but it’s still really good. I alwa…

I’ll take Daisy Fuentes. Sure, Tom and Bob were better hosts, but I’ll take Daisy Fuentes. 

Yeah, your four and half years overdue.

The biggest drawback to the McDLT was that it left that disgusting gray meat exposed. Gotta hide that shit. 

My review, two words: shit sandwich.

NBC was just looking for a reason to fire MK. There were ratings leaking out of her. . .wherever.

Bob Hope was a manic-depressive so even he didn’t find himself funny some days.

You just got Kavanaughed!

Actually it’s The Boofers debut album, The Boofers, Non Stop Boofing! Coming to record store near you. . .Whaddaya mean there aren’t any records stores no more? Fuckin’ Boofers!

I just free-base freeze-dried.

I only watch women’s tennis and. . .this next adjective is very important--college field hockey.

To paraphrase Mike Royko, “I had to leave half my soda undrunk cuz the waiter failed to pour it for me.”

**Waitress refills my water for the third time.** “Dude, are drinking this shit or filling your bong with it?” 

I thought you might mention Mark Sandman from Morphine. I saw those guys at The Metro back in the early ‘90's. 

I completely agree. I was just telling my very special lady friend that all these red state democrats ought to fall on their swords and vote this turd down. They’ve already given up on taking the senate, at least take a fucking stand.

**Sighs longingly** Yeah, that was a great war. 

His Native American name would be Wolf Dick.