Still: 96 mph is pretty fast.

Unless, of course, you ever wanted to go outside. Beautiful, beautiful country all over that state.

When he finally reliquishes the Knicks, it can only be because he lost a headcuttin’ blues duel to this man:

Even though we ain’t got money, I’m so in love with this comment, honey.

You disagree and believe that it is as simple as the American electorate clearly loves minorities and women enough to just elect the next one that comes along, even though that very thing did not happen when the next one came along?

It’s definitely not as simple as “we elected a black guy so we can just do that kind of thing again.” The electorate just isn’t lined up for that.

Well, don’t forget that a black man was elected over a woman, who then gained some valuable foreign policy experience (because that experience had previously been limited to lying about being near sniper fire in Bosnia), and then that same woman ran against the most repugnant presidential candidate, certainly that has…

“Stop saying jets are a disaster!”

+1 beer at Ecklund and Swedlin’s.

Authorities just released a photo of the two guys William H. Macy met with to start this process:

They caught up to the fan in the altercation:

I wouldn’t say it’s completely out of the question. He somehow managed to become president, and even he didn’t plan on that one. Sometimes, stupid shit happens for stupid reasons. The world is stupid.

I’m not advocating that Tucker Carlson should get his lilywhite ass kicked, but I sure wouldn’t mind walking by as it was happening. 

Here’s a thought, and I’m just spit-balling: What if the school guarantees the kid won’t get paid? 

This reminds of the very complex greenscreen ESPN used to make it look like Stephen A. was giving habitual abuser and noted shitstain Floyd Mayweather a pass for his actions in exchange for access.

I’m not sure the cancer cares what he wants to do. As Christopher Hitchens said, “there is no stage five.”

Thanks, Trump.

I went to the doctor and guess what he told me, guess what he told me?

I saw him on a Mid South card early, early. ’83 or something? It was after his Texas Stadium retirement match with Fritz, which says a lot about his work as a heel a couple years into his career: The booker/promoter used him for his own last match. Which, being Fritz, meant putting the Von Erich over, but still.

Maybe Giannis was too distracted by being in the same building with a by God feta factory?