This was hands down my favorite part.

That is objectively Phil Mickelson.

I’m here specifically for the commentary on individual punches/kickes/blazers

Your use of interesting instead of the normal “what a time to be alive” perfectly captured my uncertainty with the state of the world.

God, your last line is the first thing in this shitty stories that finally got me to crack a smile.

In college, a friend and his roommates just stopped buying toilet paper. Their strategy was to only poop before they had to shower. This was somehow both the laziest and most convoluted possible solution.

Nah.

My wife pushes for every 4-5 weeks. I usually go 6-7. Funny thing is I unequivocally look sloppy during those extra two weeks. She has the correct time frame, but I’m lazy.

They might be a large school, but they’ve hardly ever experienced success with basketball. They’ve always been known as a lacrosse mecca.

When is a generalization like this ever a good thing? There are men and women who suck in stressful situations.

Seriously, I have an 05 Tahoe with 3rd row seats and I even have this annoyance. Car top carrier is in my future I guess.

Can I just say that I’m genuinely impressed that you just admitted liking a Camry and choosing to wear Vibrams in the same post. That is incredibly brave.

Born and raised in Nebraska, college in Iowa. I have your cross country pro tip. Heed this advice. Time your drive appropriately. You should be hitting Des Moines, IA around 10 pm. You then drink a bunch of coffee and continue west with your copilot. Tag team the drive. If all goes according to plan you have crossed…

As a bit of context, regardless of how good either team is in football or basketball, fans get more excited for this matchup than almost every other game. Being down 20 and winning will pretty much override any students bodies better judgement.

The commentators even immediately called out the concussion spotters for leaving him in after the game. I hope Goodell punishes himself by ordering a pizza and then starting at it all night.

What in the fuck is this comment?

Someone help me with this, the calls for Presidents to step down remind me a ton of dysfunctional countries, where people protest the leader, get them removed, and nothing changes. Shouldn’t there be more sweeping, less reactionary goals of these protests? Getting one guy fired who maybe didn’t react appropriately…

Hey man, I dislike you.

I got a pretty good feeling he was making a joke there buckaroo.

Read first comment: “yeah, this guy is being reasonable”. Read second comment: “shit, I hope he’s trolling”.