That's at least a 7.2. Not sure what the 40 time was.

What if you discover that the goat is your true love?

I would like to say that your advice falls short of finish line. I’ve seen this bitch. I’ve fucked this bitch. I cried for this bitch. But I LEARNED from this bitch. Firstly, this C is an asshole and needs an adjustment. No need to go all primal and beat him, but definitely worth taking his little prize bitch. How you…

A better question is, “You just found out your true love has been fucking a goat every three months. Are they still your true love?”

I had hopes that this would be the first Deadspin staff chat in history in which no one asked a question about us cannibalizing each other.

Referring to women as “females” definitely helps your credibility here...

...you realize saying it was statistically insignificant works against the point you’re trying to make, right?

I think we can all see the easy solution to this one. Use her credit card to buy tranquilizer darts on the internet, and do some searches about “how to murder people” from her computer. When she’s in the shower, use her phone to invite C over for blowjobs on a night when you know she won’t be around. When he arrives,…

Are you suggesting that those are significantly different circumstances or the same? “Engaged after a few months” vs “married after I think a year”

oh fuck

Took me at least three reads to conclude that he was talking about his kids, not (a) about a threesome or (b) maintaining a few girls on the side.

If anyone actually read their Bible and saw what, the description of that, it’s disgusting.

Ah, come on. That’s not that bad of a tweet. Cut the man some slacks.

No. She’s still in Kentucky

“I admire his stamina”—Rick Pitino

He [Donald Trump] gets South Park—its cheap spite, its self-congratulation, the fantasy that privileged scorn for political correctness is subversive, rather than the exact opposite—better than the Pauls ever did...

Chip Kelly is racist

So you’re saying they’d have to practice...wow man. That’s deep.

I’ve always wondered where this idea comes from that lawsuits are (a) easy to file, and (b) usually baseless. Having worked for a personal injury law firm, I can assure you that it’s difficult to find a lawyer who will take a baseless claim. We rejected people with demonstrably legitimate claims all the time just…