Oh god, it’s happening.

WOW she looks like Jessica Lange!

My vagina just clamped shut like a bear trap.

I hope his inner monologue reads like Beavis from Beavis and Butthead.

‘It was Fred Smith! In the parking lot! With an ICE PICK!’ The geriatric Floridian version of Clue.

“...Florida.”

The slightly lamer origin story for Daredevil.

My best friend’s mom needed a kidney and no one we knew was a match. So my friend and I gave genetic information to the Univ of Neb Med Center and they submitted it to the Paired Donation database. Turned out I matched a guy in Iowa (who needed a kidney) and my friend’s mom matched his wife (who was a willing donor).…

Just over here, realizing how I don’t think I could ever be so selfless. O.o

I hope he tipped her more than 20%

Leicester City has announced that the Pearson, Hopper, and Smith are to be suspended indefinitely, starting immediately. Team officials cited their own internal standards of professional conduct, which requires that all players film potentially embarrassing videos in landscape.

“Please explain comedy to me.”

Since this ended in a thai, it went to a shootout.

Well, I’d consider “I Saw Her Standing There” a pretty fucking good contribution to rock and roll. Pissing off every old person in the UK didn’t hurt either.

Because the early Beatles were really changing the genre of rock n roll

Can you imagine Nirvana existing during the internet age? Or Alice N Chains? I guess they sort of do, but I mean back when they were all still alive. They would have been miserable. I just imagine a band like Led Zeppelin pretty much imploding about two albums in if they existed now.