Calm down jackass. It’s about the way its made, not the tea itself.

Applejuice’s story reminds me of this. Sorry for the length. A guy falls in love with a proctologist. He goes to the proctologist’s office and says that he has an obstruction.

“Do your parents know you gals are here”

“I’m just curious when you expand the user base to an entire population what side effects go undetected?”

If a side effect can’t actually be detected, it isn’t much of a negative side effect.

If there are actual legitimate non-debunked studies saying that something is a possible side effect, and your doctor says that it isn’t a possible side effect, then you need a new doctor.

“How could we ever truly control for it and say unequivocally that vaccs don’t have unintended effects?”

I don’t think that anybody…

Honestly, it’s like the painfully smarmy, “Hello, laaaayyy-deeeez, how are We doing today,” that I occasionally get when out with groups of women, but for the older set: condescending, disingenuous, and playing off the idea that all women want is someone to tell us we’re pretty and flirt with us. I hope it elicits as…

I worked as a phone census worker in 2010. Having to be polite to racists made me want to throw things. My blood pressure skyrocketed that summer.

Ugh. Imagine if there was no middle-man, just that server and a confused elderly person.

I live in Baltimore and it happens a lot. Or they just have herbal tea. It’s really common. I’m glad that’s not your experience, but it’s happened to me enough that I’ve stopped ordering tea because I can’t do it without sounding like a douche.

Americans do have good tea. The difference is that if you order tea at many (most in my experience) places in America you don’t get that tea. You get Lipton’s which is horrible. In Britian places that offer tea have good or really good tea. I love tea and ordered it everywhere when I lived in Ireland. I don’t order it…

Context — 38 is pretty damn old to be hitting on a 21-year-old.

Ugh, I have an old person ordering the wrong thing in Baker’s Square story. We took my 82 year old great-grandmother Christmas shopping, then stopped there for lunch. When she was looking for chicken tenders on the menu, she noticed something she had never seen or heard of before: chicken stir fry. She asked my mom…

Yeah. when I say “I want shrimp cocktail” I am talking about eating shrimp till I am full. Preferably in my own home. Where no one can judge me. And I don’t care if the ocean calls and says they are running out of shrimp.

See, I look at cranky, demandy, complainy, bitter elderly people,and backtrace it to the cranky, demandy, complainy, bitter young and middle-aged people, only we often dress it up in entertaining sarcasm and snark. But if your entire life consists of angrily ranting about things that frustrate you, you are setting…

TEA EMERGENCIES INCLUDE: Tea exists, and is not currently being consumed by me. Thanks.

...that’s not cocktail sauce at all then. More like a lame fry sauce.

On free pie day our Baker’s Square reeks like a charnal house from all the seniors packed in there, seething with ancient indignation over every little thing. I once saw a wizened old lady complain that her tea was too hot and demand the waitress “fix” it. The poor woman had to stand there pouring little drips of her…

The restaurant I worked at in high school was close enough to a grocery store that I could have run over, bought shrimp & cocktail sauce and made a shrimp cocktail in a reasonable span of time. I would not have done so because that would be teaching the old fart that endless complaining will eventually get you what…

Well, once you read it you will learn you can go into any restaurant and get one! You may have to make your own cocktail sauce though...

* Tea emergencies can include but are not limited to: something bad happened; something good happened; something might happen soon but I’m waiting to see; it is the afternoon; it is the morning; something reminded me of tea; there is a social gathering that requires tea.