I remember when I was playing this online game, and a 18-year-old kid who I had grouped with a few times, sent me a link of a woman spread-eagle and wrote, "Can you tell me where the clitoris is? I just don't know." And I photoshopped a little arrow pointing to it. And the next day he wrote, "Thank you. My GF…

Excuse me while I go into the Mary Kaye studio to get my makeup on. I'll BRB. Then we can talk about our Walmart ribeye steaks.

He is hot. No hair. NO HAIR! HOT MAN WITH NO HAIR!

If it works for Jimmy Page . . .

Part of the BIG issue is how the site is set up for comments now. I literally have to scroll down and down and down (and down X1000000) sometimes to find comment threads I care about. Right now, I'm getting original comments mixed in with SOME (or all) responses. And Jesus Christ, fucking fix this. It's like being…

As a whitey white person, I just don't know. Part of me thinks that there is no way Naomi "slam a phone upside your head" Campbell would put up with any shit she does not deem appropriate.

Step 1: Read Jezebel Article

I was wondering what it looked like so I followed the link. And holy shit. Are ex-inmate ankle bracers THAT big? I dunno.

I agree. You really are a fucktard.

The thing is, in my head, I see the kid being a complete dickhole to his mother. Like "SuperNanny" type bad. And in that situation, the guy is a hero.

I can't agree with the dick thing, but come on. You shouldn't hold in your farts.

I'd say yes, yes she is a wizard.

One of my friends asked the waitress at Denny's to please "baste" his eggs for breakfast. "Baste them," he said. And when the waitress left, I told him if he ever pulled that shit in Denny's again, I would beat his ass.

Poor US pigeons. They're like the Tara Reid of the bird world.

She-Hulk would be awesome. I would watch the shit out of that.

I'm not a comic book reader, but I liked the idea of Elektra.

I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this. I have mixed feelings all around. Kneejerk reaction is that the Australian couple are complete assholes.

I used to work for a 1-900 sex Tarot line. (But guys would call in all the time to try and get sexy talk.) One guy wanted me to "read his cards" and tell him all about how he liked to tie socks into knots and stick them up his butt.