Fuck you, Cowboys. Shouldn't have been there to begin with.

So it's an issue when it happens to a Cowboy but not an issue when it happens to a Lion. NFL= $$$

The whining of butthurt Dallas Criminals fans is music to my ears.

#allcatchesmatter

Oil spill! Oil spill!

As bear did not eat any Dorito pie, role of weed unclear....

I hope my vagina has a cute little voice like that! Mine probably sounds like Dr. Girlfriend, though.

I was really sad when I found out that Beck was a scientologist.

My first rat was called Chester MacFistacuffs.

They were my pets when they were still alive. RIP my 20 former little buddies. I don't have pictures of all of them because they were mostly pre-facebook days and I'm not at home. My first rat was called Chester MacFistacuffs and he was a genius. Ah, I miss him the most.

Is this where we post some favourite pics of our pet rats?

Murray: Let me tell you a story about Cardinals fans that will show exactly what I’m talking about. I’m filming a movie back in the 80’s. Which movie it is isn’t important; I was high as a kite during filming it, that’s all that matters. Anyway, one day we finished shooting for the day, so myself and a cameraman named…

For my money, she’s a disgrace as a human. What’s she going to decree next? 10 lashes in the public square, for the 8 year old that didn’t eat their broccoli? Also,

I haven’t even read the post yet. Just wanted to say that now I want shrimp cocktail. Like, ALL of the shrimp. Thanks.

clearly damon

Yeah, but do they FLAUNT their resemblance?

you’re so right—i’ll adjust my blueprints

I’m a Browns fan. My dad is a Browns fan. He offered me the chance to get out when I was 10 years old. I’m an idiot.

+1 broken dream

And so I equivocate like Hamlet.