I don't think he'll ever top Left of Self-Centered; then again, that album was so awesome and underappreciated that I still have fond memories of it all these years later…

He's Butch freakin' Walker; he could get the Heimlich Maneuver chart tattooed on his ass and it would still be awesome…

I'm 42, and I felt so old and out of touch last time I stepped into a Hot Topic store that I have vowed never to set foot upon their soil again. It's a real shame, seeing as how a disenfranchised individual such as me once felt at home within its walls; now I only hear cold, howling wind from the storefront…

Call me old-fashioned, but when that giant who holds up the Earth dies, we are screwwwwweeeedddd!

The first album I ever purchased for myself was "Hysteria" by Def Leppard; I was 15 at the time and I was almost exclusively into hair bands. Though my tastes have evolved and shifted in the two and a half decades since, I'll always have fond memories of playing the cassette on my boombox while playing Nintendo with…

I gave up on all comic strips years ago when I realized most of them were just rehashing the same few jokes over and over; it doesn't matter if you're talking about Garfield, Beetle Bailey, Hagar the Horrible, Family Circus, or any of those tired old strips whose writers clearly ran out of steam years ago…

My graduating class of 1990 chose "Never Say Goodbye" by Bon Jovi; whoever approved that song apparently missed the line where it was implied the singer took his girlfriend's virginity in his car's backseat. Make of that what you will…

I wasn't planning to see this movie in the first place, but now I kinda feel obligated to do so just to spite those butthurt North Koreans. Damn you, hackers…

The only way I could see this sequel working is if Lydia is now a successful author specializing in stories of the supernatural based upon her own experiences; she also has a teenage daughter who is somehow tricked into summoning the titular ghost, thus inviting chaos on a grand scale…

The bright side is that he won't be homeless much longer; he'll have a nice padded room waiting for him and a straitjacket to keep him warm…

I will always have a soft spot for A Charlie Brown Christmas; the goofy dances the kids do during the rehearsal is one of the most priceless scenes in TV history…

Good lord; what were they huffing when they came up with this pairing?!

He'll stop the world and melt for you…

Good riddance; it was a pile of crap that CBS tried to piggyback on "The Big Bang Theory". That's typically what networks do when they know a show is a likely turd; someone needs to tell the writers that Oedipal jokes wear thin quickly…

Somehow I doubt any Queensryche fans have $50K to pony up; that's not a dig at the band, it's just that they always seemed like a working and thinking man's band…

I thought he was dead; oh, wait, that's Michael Jackson I was thinking of…

Gotta be tough to get a dinner reservation with a name like one of these:

Not only that; the so-called "Dracula" looks like Dr Frank N. Furter tried to clone himself…

I went as Popeye in one of those awful "box costumes" two years in a row; that was when I was four and five years old and I loved the Popeye cartoons back then, so I didn't know any better. Fortunately, my mother had some skill with a sewing machine, so the next year I went as an astronaut in a homemade faux flight…

Good thing Kurt Cobain was cremated; if they'd buried him, he'd have rolled in his grave enough times to resurface in China…