This rules.

In fairness, I think would let Beyonce nurse me back to health, too.

I just feel like someone somewhere is telling Miley to do all this stupid shit and she just does it like Derek Zoolander in a dancing monkey costume.

So dumb. +1

Well, I hope your penis falls off and then is carried away by one of those giant eagles from Lord of the Rings, never to be seen again.

Wow, so that’s it, eh? The greatest moment of the NFL season? Hyperbole much?

Tame Impala.

You know we’ve got some restrictions on other rights, as well, like freedom of speech, right? Also, Obama is calling on congress to make these changes (he’s not, for instance, enacting these changes with an executive order), so I’m not sure how that constitutes a lack of due process.

I love Love LOVE when actual honesty collides with mass media. It’s just so consistently riveting.

Well, in the immortal words of Harvey Dent, you either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. I’d say this stupid campaign fits Kobe pretty well, to be honest.

If the best cheer your school (and my alma mater) can come up with starts with a crowd literally spelling out the word ill, your athletics program has more issues than one single coach or AD.

Wonderful! Disgusting, but wonderful.

Man, Lionel Richie has really aged incredibly well!

Really truly completely shocking that this happened. Never would’ve expected it.

To be fair, you’re a Gawker media site. To characterize yourself as a simple, innocent journalist just trying to get facts is really oversimplifying the issue.

Everybody knows the proper singular form is Emojus. Get your shit together, Oxford English Dictionary!!!

I’ll bet she told him to get back back back back back back back back back back back back

Leave Tsuyoshi Wada out of this, you guys!

You have chosen ...wisely.