One day Portnoy is going to get pushed out of his own company and then he’s going to band together with Anthony Cumia, Bill O’Reilly, and Harvey Weinstein to make The Avengers, But For Misogyny/Racism

Jets fans were the original slaves, ya know

I had a similar experience growing up working in cherry orchards in Oregon. It shouldn’t be much of a surprise, though. The average age of a farmer is in the 60s. They’re entitled boomers who rode the wave of post-war economic boom (not to mention the explosion of productivity due to nitrate fertilizers, caused by the…

Mike Cernovich could have got Vic Berger killed and his account stayed up. But yeah a bunch of internet people texting Stephen Miller the pig poop balls picture is definitely worse.

Ok, so this is really vague and I’m going to apply more normal heuristic for predicting Trump’s behavior.

Start with the worst belief you can imagine (“immigrants aren’t real people” qualifies) and then make it into a policy that’s petty, cruel, and over-reaching in application. Then make it somehow also…

I think it’s fine to email people “what’s your fucking deal?” when they obviously have a weird fucking deal. It’s especially fine to do so when you aren’t looking to republish their press release on how nuanced and brilliant their article was. The press release was their response and it was garbage. So be…

It’s amazing that they live in a state where the effects of unfettered depletion of natural resources couldn’t be more apparent (they have a LAKE OF SULFURIC ACID outside Butte) and yet the money and political actors are in bed together, keeping the gas pedal pushed to the floor, when it comes to environmental…

The Bushs are like one of those evolution of man charts but in reverse and also they weren’t human at the beginning

I’ve never understood why reporters play along with this “tronc” bullshit, by which I mean the omission of the capital T. Fuck them, they’re not ee cummings. Fuck right outta here with your stupid Disney cartoon villain’s thug sidekick-ass name.

Republican campaign ads have been more effective leaning into the apocalypse they’re stewarding. The burden of optimism is always on liberals. Can you imagine if you recreated this ad with a member of the Black Panthers? Conservatives would lose their fucking minds.

The Space Force thing is really getting to me, and I can’t figure out why. I should probably focus on how much money they will waste on it and how often they’ll look to get into skirmishes for the sake of justifying its existence. But all I can think about is how Trump just seems like an enormous toddler who realized…

I’ve been loving me some lemon balm recently. It pops up as a weed all over my neighborhood and as such, it’s extremely hardy. But unlike the accursed bed thatch or even more accursed English ivy, lemon balm tastes and smells delicious and if it gets in your flower bed, it’s not a big deal. It’s like if one of those…

Dana white is an imbecile. It’s hard to see why he’s still the figurehead now that global capital is behind the show. His need to make a star—and his conception of what that star should look like—is the main thing keeping the sport from evolving.

I love how the whiteboard behind him says, “potential emerging problems.” All it needs is one of these —>

I worked at a Subway in high school for two years. The bosses were cruel and petty and sexually harassed the employees, and by the end of my time, I was over it. I would bake trays of cookies for my friends and close the shop down an hour early at night to avoid dealing with customers. Scott Pruitt has somehow been…

shes nice tho

I reply to every Katherine Krueger post to tell her she’s not allowed to dislike Joy Reid, Hillary Clinton, Chuck Schumer, et al. She’s obsessed with them and I make for goddamn sure she knows it.

From the first time I’ve seen him, Chucky has stirred up some amygdala-level, primordial rage in me. My brain doesn’t even really register coherent criticisms of him most of the time. An autonomic “FUCK YOU.” jumps up in me every time I see his stupid fucking pinstripe suits, greased hair, and brainless smile.

In a year in which prominent republicans have defended basically every evil person doing the most evil things they can think of, I haven’t seen anyone jump to Greitens’ defense. Certainly seems like he’s more than the run-of-the-mill GOP sex-dungeon-haver.

Her and Don Jr. go to three meetings a day in which they sit through a powerpoint presentation given by someone whose name they never learn and stare with open mouths and glassy, uncomprehending eyes, fidgeting with their $9K bracelet or $29K pinky ring, until the lights come back on and they can post on Twitter about…