There exists the possibility that the things number two.

"Jeb? My name is Guy Incognito!"

Drake references are appropriate given how Canada's black population will spike if Trump is elected.

Has any candidate ever fumbled primary season as badly as Jeb! has and come out on top simply because the establishment favors him? I legit can't remember.

It was a success for Trump because it boosts him with people who are entirely defined by their resentment of liberals and minorities, a demographic that was already voting for him and accounts for about a quarter of less than half the country.

Hey, this has to play in Iowa, say "courts."

Before The Illegals Nation attacked, you would have gotten a whole quarter for posting this instead of a nickel.

I just can't believe he has all this time and still regularly turns out new Curb episodes.

I don't feel right profiting at the expense of the poor regulars over there who have to go all morning without "HilLIARy is going to jail LMAO but WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE #BENGHAZIIIIIIIIIII"

#BurnJost

It's funny 'cuz it's true.

I thought the sketch with Reagan being this on-the-ball Machiavellian chessmaster behind closed doors and having to pivot back to doddering whenever he's in the public eye was pretty funny.

History will zero in on the "I have to suspend my campaign now, my planet needs me" when the banks failed, but I think it was a moment that he wasn't even directly responsible for: that campaign worker who carved a "B" in her face in the mirror (backwards and everything) and said a big black Obama supporter did it.

Well yeah, he's like 12.

I always forget someone who was in that. It's like a political Love, Actually. Even Mao's translator was a pre-fame Bai Ling.

Go back to bed, Donald, you can read your Google News Alert later.

2002, really? Huh, I thought it was later than that because I remember him being a hot ticket when the Beltway press had that stupid idea that John Kerry should see if he wanted to be his running mate, however that would work.

No, he didn't, which honestly makes it even weirder. Although that was the Bush-second-term period where the media and the left somehow had it in their heads that McCain was this above-partisanship straight-talker instead of a grumpy old man who voted with his party 90% of the time and had a love of war to rival Judge…

Two hours if they see a woman with a hijab and start a fight.

I think some midwestern NBC affiliate didn't even air the Sharpton show because they said it'd violate equal-time rules.