That story about the woman who got doused with red wine? I had a similar experience and similarly laughed it off. As a server was setting a nice large martini (with a lemon twist, not an olive) in front of me his hand trembled for some reason and the whole thing went down the front of my shirt. The look of horror on…

I had a huge brown spider crawl out of the space between my windshield and the frame of the car while I was driving. Freaked me the heck out. I tried to kill it and it scurried back into the frame. I’m now worried that it will lay eggs and the babies will get into the inner workings of the car and turn it into a…

Wait, that’s only acceptable when we’re teenagers. Maybe that’s why my wife is always annoyed with me.

So basically the vast majority of my comments to date have been boring? Damn, I crack myself up all the time.

What a dick... there is a bee shortage man...

Hey dude, can you please stop leaving notes on my Hummer? Thanks.

DON’T. FUCKING. KILL. BEES.

Dude! Cheez-its are the shiz-its! Throw in some Mountain Dew and Xbox and your night is set!

Cheez-Its or Goldfish (cheddar), who you got?

Life's just easier with meth.

I have a crazy positive mechanic story to tell. I was driving back from college in Southern PA to CT for the summer and the rock-solid Chrysler Town & Country I was driving started to overheat around Harrisburg. I pulled over, dumped some water in the radiator, and kept driving. A half a mile later, it overheated…

Sounds like he really liked his car in the first one, so it must've been a

A horror story from my collection: In the 1990's, I was a 22 year old college student, a single mom, and drove a British Sterling purchased from an auction. I meticulously maintained the car as I didn't have money to pay for preventable breakages. I was in a northern state about 1500 miles away from home when I…

Or are lazy.

I've had some great customer service at PF Chang's. When I was a senior in high school (like, right after PF Chang's opened in my city, and I adored it . . . still do) I had my graduation luncheon there, with about 20 of my closest girlfriends and my grandmothers, mom, and aunts. My maternal grandmother was losing her…

Friday my bf and I went to Chipotle. He always asks for extra cheese, and is similarly disappointed. Well this time the girl behind the counter took both hands, grabbed massive amounts of cheese and dumped it on the burrito. Twice. I guess I looked surprised when she did it because she said "The man asked for extra…

You never know with macanamera. He inspires confidence in people. For example: I once heard that some guy went to all the trouble of importing a Nissan Skyline and then, while the ink was still drying on the paperwork, he let macanamera drive it after only knowing him for an hour.

Honest mistake there, though, since 95%+ cars aren't and he was just reciting the corporate jargon that they're supposed to tell customers.

One time when I was outside of a Cheesecake Factory smoking a cigarette a man propositioned me thinking I was a hooker.

I wonder if anyone ever comes here and is like "Oh my god, that was me."