I didn't order Santana's Abraxas! I don't want Santana's Abraxas!

Open it up, let it breathe. This is wine, Larry. This is not Mogen David.

I can't not play it, man; it's the only Cage game I haven't played. Cage is my Black Grail— I hate everything he does but find his incompetence fascinating. I need to understand him and his stupid brain. Heavy Rain is my least favorite game of all time and I've played it 5 times, every time finding some new layer of…

You know you can just say "a David Cage game."

I'm still working through the article, but thanks for taking a moment to acknowledge Vigoda's death up there. That one got me hard, for reasons I still don't understand.

DON'T EVERYBODY LOVE THE SMELL OF GASOLIIIINE

The main thing for me was the scope of it. The front 2/3rds feel grounded and populated with real people, and then there's a hard veer into the grotesque— the cult is actually real and not just methed up occult imagery, there's an inbred hillbilly monster who's super-strong and descended from aristocracy and also the…

Also better direction and a more interesting setting.

Ugh, Space Jam. I can't believe nostalgia for a 90-minute show commercial with no good jokes, a terrible lead performance, and a fuckdoll rabbit.

Leo never made a movie where his hands were dicks and he out his hands in his mom and then he had to get his hands cut off.

Nah, Drive is an iconic performance of cool aloofness that gradually cracks to reveal a raw heart of isolation and childish neediness, and the way he repurposed that archetype into a horny dead-eyed homunculus afraid of his own urges in Only God Forgives was really interesting. Plus, he's fucking hilarious in the Nice…

Ordinary fuckin' people. I hate 'em!

That's it— like Vonnegut, it uses crude and juvenile stuff to explore what it is to be human. It's like a movie-length meditation on the "this is what their assholes looked like" moment from Breakfast of Champions.

Well put— I hadn't quite gotten what you meant, but now I do.

My issue has more to do with the fact that the parent company took it out of the hands of Ken Levine and farmed it out to another division so that they could sell a sequel, nothing with the game itself. I think, as a game, it's fine, but it's a perfect example of the way that actual creators and artists get sidelined…

He got stabbed in the face 15 years back or so, though, which didn't help. It happened in my hometown!

Man, I wouldn't insult another series for being "tonally incoherent" in a post defending Fallout 2. I love the game, but it is a mess of different tones, pop culture references, edginess for its own sake, and out-of-place comedy. I can definitely get why some people wouldn't like it.

The fact that the Silent Hill movie uses Yamaoka's original score and had him heavily involved in the soundtrack has a lot to do with that, as well. That's showing some actual respect for the artistry of the source material, not just pillaging it for parts.

Huh, I guess it is, then.

We don't talk about Bioshock 2.