The thirst is real. In anything, anything is better than masturbating, again.

The 1860s.

DeMarcus Ware took Oher to the cleaners; thankfully Sandra Bullock picked him up a few hours later.

I know that play is more iconic because of the timing and Cam not going for the fumble, but as a former collegiate defensive end (WELL LADEEDAAAA) his strip sack for the touchdown in the first quarter is one of the best defensive plays I’ve ever seen. To beat a tackle that badly then have the wherewithal to process…

It’s not Cam’s fault. It’s hard to see beyond the glare of your own beaming personality.

We all get out of playing with our stupid kids in our own way.

At one point does a dunk not become a dunk? How far away from the basket do they have to be? Or is simply any play with that arm motion and authority a dunk, even if their hand isn’t touching the rim?

Similarly, when I open the front door, nobody expects me to have pants on.

You call your donger “debate”?

Somewhere, a Florida land developer fondly recalls the time he tortured Mark Brunell’s bank accounts to death.

If there is anyone who can fix leaks with a handful of spare parts, it’s Tomsula.

“Woof, woof, woof.”

That? That is why they use Spanish audio?

Tebow.

Zimmerman proved self-defense. Also, contrary to popular myth, he did not invoke Florida's "stand your ground" laws. He claimed he was attacked and defended himself, i.e., good old-fashioned self defense. You can disagree with the verdict or the Jury's interpretation of the facts, but that's how it went down, legally.

Ridiculous.

I’m surprised it was ruled a catch.

I just kinda throw my hands up in the air at this point.

I saw the new Coca-Cola ad, in which the mother gives her 12 year old ginger ragamuffin two bottles of soda to help him woo a prospective dance partner at the school cotillion. Teaching him, as if he wouldn’t already know, a redhead requires coke to pull a chick.

It hasn't been as widely reported, but Andy Dalton was also walking gingerly after their game.