If you want to go back to the 80s, just do a lot of coke and vote for Ronald Reagan.

So who's the 40 year old that will be playing high school era Samantha?

They might go into berzerker mode; come at you like a whirling dervish,
all fists and elbows. You might be screaming "No, no, no" and all they
hear is "Who wants cake?" Let me tell you something: They all do. They
all want cake..

I give it three years before they actually start making some of the Adam Sandler movies as suggested by Awesome-O.

I hope she ends up going ham on some director's face with a pair of roller skates.

Sorry Surly.

Even Surly thought she was being a dick.

Your gun is digging into my hip.

Please oh please tell me she was wearing a homemade Catwoman suit at the time.

If you're Sam Neil's character, how do you NOT beat the ever loving shit out of William H. Macy and Tea Leoni at the end of that movie?  I mean, they get rescued, but he was still essentially kidnapped and almost killed dozens of times.  You'd think he would've at least grabbed a gun from one of the Marines and shot…

Paid $9 for a book of stamps.  What ethnic group can I blame for this?

I demand the return of Rock n' Jock B-Ball!

Gollum's parents never let him go out on dates in high school unless he could find her a date as well.

She looks like one of the Mexicans that Sweet Dee gave a makeover to on the Extreme Home Makeover episode of Always Sunny.

Steven Seagal IS…still waiting for his order at the KFC drive-thru.

I inevitably think of Mr. B's sweet robotic voice.  Ohhhhhhh Wesley.

There's so many of those things by now that its physically impossible to live on Earth and not eventually have one.

I enjoy Tyler Perry if only for the legions of white people who exclaim "Oh sure, when HE says those things about black people its OK, but when I say them its RACIST!" when seeing previews for his films.

I'm still waiting for the perfect time to bust out my WORKER UND PARASITE joke.

So basically Argentina showed up to the Falklands "just to hang for the weekend, man" and ended up sleeping on Britain's couch for like, 2 goddamned months.