I spray my comforter down with Lysol

“I’m most afraid of the same as the last four years. Nothing in life is free, and that’s what really needs to be fixed here and in the whole country. The people are living off the system. The people that are coming in and we’re helping out more than we’re helping out our own. And school has to be fixed, we’re paying…

That’s why I make sure I’m awake by 11:00 AM. It’s really that 30 minutes of peace and quiet that makes being a morning person so rewarding.

I find it delightful that she eats all that ridiculous shit, yet her name is Bacon.

This is an amazing story. I'm so sorry but I can't stop laughing.

This one, from the original piece at the New Yorker, is almost unbelievable:

Bernie is a shill for democratic rule. I'll take that shill any day.

the outsized political hope that “youth” have before they realize that every politician is a shill, nobody with real values is actually electable, and also that God Is Dead.

“He’s a man of deep faith..”

I had nothing against them until recently, but damn the “12s” thing is just so goddamn obnoxious. The Maude Flanders-style letter writing is just the icing on that particular shitcake; this year with the Cam thing, and last year some screeching fishwife wrote a similar letter after Edelman punched a Richard Sherman…

I used it briefly, but always felt it was like being yelled at by passing motorists.

I thought I was the only one who noticed this! The Gawker regular commenters (and by regular I mean freaks who comment dozens/hundreds of times per day within minutes of each post) are masters of these.

Here’s a cute puppy gif.

The bathtub water isn’t to drink, it’s to flush your toilet in case pipes freeze or the pumping stations lose power, (edited to remove name-calling).

Fuck cancer

That elephant looks too much like Babar and it’s making me sad.

RIP The Vane. Gone but not forgotten.

Yeah that persisted into the early 90's.

See, I like the shape because I can always find it easily in the bottom of my purse.

“Can you believe that we’re both sitting in this Oval Office?”