None of these dumb motherfuckers has the first idea of what “Socialism” even means.

And if you explained it to them (which I did today), you get treated to the AMAZING line I got:

“That...Actually sounds good? That can’t be what it is, that would mean they’re lying on the news.”
*looooooooooooong dead stare from me*
“I’ll…

Oh he knows perfectly well.

For anyone wondering why Graham does this:

Graham’s been informed that if he doesn’t willingly and eagerly slurp up Trump’s flaccid ego in public enthusiastically and without question, the world finds out about his proclivities for diddling little boys thanks to a little leak from Russia.

As far as I’ve been able to tell from following this, the CPD is (very quietly) alleging Smollett thought he’d get some kind of leverage out of being the victim of an assault and paid the two guys to do this to him. They haven’t come right out and said it, but that’s pretty evidently where they’re going with this.

Right…

As more people age into their demographic, that continues to work.

You think every GOPer now was a stalwart pro-Vietnam hawk back in the day? Fuck no, those pot smoking free love hippies in ‘69 grew up, got corporate jobs, and decided that all that free love shit wasn’t so cool when it meant not getting to hoard stuff…

Look at the faces in this picture.

Trump: “I’m gonna make this New York piece of shit m— oh god. OH GOD NO NO NO NO LET GO THE GEEEEERRRRRMS”

Baldwin: “This look I’m giving you right now tells you the last thing I did before shaking your hand this firmly is stick my own fingers way the hell up my asshole, and I KNOW you…

Yup. This is pretty much the greatest sci-fi manga story ever told.

Fascinating stuff regarding the original ending, though!

Like a lot of fans, I got to the end of original manga and went “...Wait, what the hell was that?” It’s super truncated, seems bizarrely abrupt and mean, and the final panels (Alita gaining a…

Yeeeah I thought that too; this reeks of “My Uncle In the CIA Taught Me”. It’s way too clever for these drunks to come up with on their own, but simple enough to remember despite being plastered if you heard about it.

The best part about these fucking chowderclowns is that, since the late 70's, they’ve gotten so  wealthy off of having zero morality whatsoever while convincing idiots that they’re paragons of True American Values that to them, time hasn’t really needed to move forward much.

They haven’t needed to keep pace with…

Fuck, is that the best you got?

How about this: Adhering to a worldview that’s hilariously, patently ineffective and hurts you more than anyone else just because you don’t wanna admit you were wrong is the easiest way the rest of us can pick out the people that nobody is going to miss when they die.

Think about all the…

The real reason he doesn’t use it much is because it won’t let him lie about his scores to the other people around him and have them believe it and congratulate him on it, which entirely defeats the purpose of playing Golf.

What, you think he likes being outside and exercising(ish) for fun?

Through it all, the camera swings drunkenly from side to side as the era’s color-warping and shitty CGI scene wipes underscore some truly righteous radio rock. Hynes eventually “sneaks in” to a tournament to narrate some high-octane, Pog-flipping action, in which a woman in an arm brace awards a bowl-cutted…

I can’t decide if this is a first world problem or just a problem that’s weirdly specific to this era in time?

Imagine having to explain the logistics of something like this to someone from, like, 1897 if you could go back there in a time machine and you had to explain what that meant, for whatever reason.

It would…

So by this point, it seems to have dawned on Trump that issuing a presidential pardon is more difficult than just barking that it be done and letting his minions take care of it.

Roger Stone’s biggest failure here is a common one among Trump’s orbit of goons: A complete and utter physical inability to put themselves in…

Did...He just pre-emptively claim responsibility for the next shutdown?

HEY REPUBLICANS: Just tell him they’re building the wall. Get a little report written up, put his name on it somewhere really big so he can sign it like a big boy, and then open up a tab on YouTube showing some random wall being constructed…

I know the difference between agenda driven fake news and reality, and I am very comfortable with this decision.

You really didn’t take the breakup well, didja?

Nailed it!

This is Trump’s weird “come to Jesus” moment that’s supposed to be a little nudge-nudge, wink-wink “Sure guys, on the surface it looks bad, but we all know some folks we can tap for quick cash when we need to right? Even if it’s a little on the down-low, it’s totally worth it so we can win.”

It hasn’t…

As someone whom has (very understandably) been forbidden from shaving by his own wife, can I just say to the members of the right attempting (in Ted’s case, “attempting” and “poorly” with way more air quotes and a vomit noise):

Gita! Good opportunity to play the six questions game:

Basically follow this flowchart to figure out what to play, and just go with your gut:

1. Do I want long, or short?
2. Do I want new, or old?
3. Do I want story, or action?
4. Do I want to feel powerful, or challenged?
5. Do I want to be omnipresent, or a character?
6.…

I wonder if he gets mad when there’s pictures where you can clearly see other people’s normal human hands in the same general area as his shriveled, slimy, raw chicken skin tag flesh stubs he refers to as “fingers”, ‘cause man I dunno if you guys noticed but they’re pretty small.