I can’t wait until Clay Helton replaces Steve Sarkisian at Alabama.

Eli, sadly, was not invited

mommest tweet of all time

My mom owns me online constantly.

Also, Samer’s dad reads Playboy for the articles.

Mark Sanchez has studied this photo for several hours. And that was before he knew there was a question about missing legs.

YES.

Drew, I am onboard the with the bread and butter restaurant idea. In fact, I would expand that to Mexican as well. Because it seems every time I go out for Mexican, i’m halfway full on chips, Queso and tortillas. Those should just be the meal.

Did he wrap it up with a couple of balls in it and roll the car over it a few times?

Not with that attitude you can’t.

Actually, Kirk and Demarcus aren’t brothers.

He good be really good, or really bad. I wish someone would write about both scenarios.

Man, I wonder how good he might be on, say, the Celtics.

Bullshit write up on this.

In Cleveland you have to be the first to find and administer a life-saving shot of adrenaline directly to the heart of an overdosed Brownie the Elf somewhere in the Flats to win tickets.

Thank god. For a while there I thought I was being racist for thinking all the winners looked alike.

This is the same reason I won’t adopt a child.

No I’ve bought my tree there. But it was a bad tree. When you buy precut ones, you gamble with a tree that may die soon.

I’m curious how Goodell will respond. On the one hand, he hates celebrations, on the other, the League likes to look the other way when players are getting their bells rung.