I clicked through to the nbc article, which says Jones had previous convictions for theft and dealing. Maybe he was on parole at the time?

I’ve been wondering if this guy is the reincarnation of Flying Squid for awhile now.

That’s basically my takeaway also. Never marry a man with multiple coke guys, is my philosophy.

I dunno, I’ve known a couple chefs, and they basically never cooked when they weren’t at work. Like, maybe a grilled cheese. They also tend to regularly use interesting illegal drugs, which I am fine with, but wouldn’t marry.

You need to read this McSweeney’s article. No werewolves, unfortunately, but other remarkably close to spec.

No, we used to, but we don’t anymore. Any kind of discount/charity shop was banned during the last Bush administration because it contributed to economic downsliding: by allowing poor people access to used goods at reduced prices, we were actually encouraging long-term poverty. Also, everyone knows that retail jobs…

“But consider, Hastings. The absurd fake mustaches...the ridiculous goatee...the supremely obvious wig. Such a childish effort to alter his appearance! Could it be that we were meant to write him off, to dismiss his disguise as too obviously a disguise?”

That’s awesome, but I have to ask: where did you get the pictures from? Did you...*lowers voice*... cut up a bunch of comic books?

Eh, that’s obviously him preparing to rape her, and going about it in a disturbingly methodical way. Perhaps the previous commenter has been raped herself, that could trigger a panic attack.

I read it like five? years ago when Barnes and Noble had it displayed all over the store. Read the entire thing in one sitting, then thought “this is voyeuristic schlock and I feel gross”.

Counterpoint: I really fucking want to see Tim Burton’s take on the pink elephants song.

This whole thread has reminded me of this classic Funny Amazon Review: A Mother’s Struggle

In my opinion, having just the one kid is a dirty trick because for the rest of her life, that one kid will be the only person who understands how fucking annoying you are. My sister and I aren’t particularly close, but when our mom really gets up my nose, or dad does that thing, you know how he is, she understands…

Depends. If I say someone wearing this at a show I wouldn’t blink. In fact in that context, its pretty awesome. If I saw someone wearing it at the grocery store, I would probably... well, not point and laugh, but at least nudge my bf and say “take a look at the evil fairy over by the milk”.

Last October I woke up one morning and my left foot was so stiff I could barely walk on it. I have no idea what caused this. The problem persisted - every morning it was stiffer than a corpse and hurt to put pressure on. I babied it and bought shoes with more arch support and tried rolling water bottles and every damn…

I think if you nixed the finally it would qualify. But that word makes it pretty obvious that you meant to be insulting. “It ups the odds of getting a championship” could be played off with a wide-eyed, innocent “I was just so happy for them!” while still implying that they aren’t that great and won basically by luck…

Shouldn’t your other half be called Pete White?

Travel mug. Flask = surreptitious booze to americans.

As far as I can tell, Catholic church schools have taken a backseat in craziness to evangelical church schools. I attended a “Church of Christ” one for middle school, and for an eighth grade earth science course was required to write a paper on why evolution was a lie.