I was worried my love for this show would wane since i’m pregnant & can’t drink while watching it, but this is a delightful hot mess.

She’s testing the waters for a spin-off of VPR, I’m sure. “Watch Sandoval as he navigates running his own bar..” You heard it here first.

My favorite moment was when Scheana was all “What, are you going to clean out my bank account?” to Shay, he responds “Maybe?”... but then actually that’s what he did.

Jax really is one of the sane ones this season. Given another 10 years, he may be an actual adult.

They never told me that KKK tears were so delcious.

Wait. That was their defense? That they weren’t the ones who threatened the partygoers? Man, fuck y’all. You rolled up six or seven cars deep into a mostly African-American neighborhood with Confederate flags flying from every single vehicle. You purposely went out looking for a fucking conflict, and when you noticed…

“I would never ...” = “I didn’t realize there would be consequences for my actions.” Which is why we are seeing an uptick in racist and anti-Semitic acts; people are getting the message that they can get away with it.

She’s hatching an egg. Leave her alone. Lizard people don’t replenish themselves.

Yeah, this is SUCH a career-ending move for a semi-retired Hollywood icon who’s been making movies for over half a century.

Both cards totally could have fit on that door!

Moonlight won the electoral college

It was the Russians.

What a twist ending! Did M. Night Shyamalan write this?! (LOL no)

Omg, this reminds me of the craziest fucking lady I ever waited on. So this lady orders a burger and asks for it well done but with absolutely no charring on it. She says if there is any pink or if there is any char on the outside, I will be wearing it. So, I relay this to the cooks, who look at me like I’m crazy.…

Having spent 7 years working in a steakhouse, I can attest that there are exactly two kinds of adults who eat steak like this:

I have lamented on more than one occasion that it’s nearly impossible to tell someone you like their skin without sounding like a murderer.

Yeah this is bad, but did they hear about Trump’s electoral college win?

Hey so my 9 month old diabolical kitten Pancake figured out how to jimmy open the cabinet where I hide the giant 2 lb Costco bag of kitty treats, and his portly brother Pie, being the type to eat his feelings, dragged it under the bed and secretly had his way with the entire thing. Ten loads of laundry and one $170…