YESSS!! Oh... wait... 😔

The nose on the new Civic and Accord are atrociously ugly IMO. Like shamefully ugly. That wide horizontal chrome strip, and it looks like it’s tilted downward on the Civic? WTF. No.

Seriously though... why/how is it that some people get in a car and operate it when they are seven sheets to the wind? I’m not talking about rationalizing away “if you’re buzzed, you’re drunk;” I’m talking about .295 plastered and drywalled into a crunkered sousitude. Like, WTF humans?

I was watching some guys wrenching in a garage a few weeks back as I walked by across the street. One was all, “What the fuck you looking at? I’ll fuck you up!”

Old? Yes...

Some guy at my office has left crap on the seat before. Like, an actual steaming pile, like the emoji. WTF.

SO WE CAN ALL MAKE MORE MONEY MORE MONEY

This all the way home.

Doug DeMuro wants to chat about this assertion, Tom.

This car is the recipient of a recent $9,200 service

Grossest was what appeared to be a little old lady, munching Planters chocolate-covered cashews in a crowded NYC subway car, who started groping my genitalia. I was so stunned I couldn’t even react, just bounced at the next station.

When I saw the headline, I was so picturing a helicopters-and-breaking-news chase at 25 mph, complete with shootout at the end. “SUSPECT REFUSES TO STOP; DEPLOYING SPIKE STRIPS NOW”

Thanks, VW.

Oh man, you said it baby. Driving any highways that require interchanges for the first time, you need to bone up on Google Street View beforehand, and have your eyes glued to a GPS so you hit the right ramp.

Mountain drive!

I’m going to be the overly literal wet blanket, because this is so absurd: how can you even answer the question, “most enjoyable?” Some people like powwah, some tossability, some luxurious interiors; lots of cars cover multiple bases, but at some point you compromise one for another. Or just go all the way to one…