Sign that cop up for the AZ hockey team! Oh, wait.....

You give him too much credit. To have kids, there typically is intercourse involved

Bet he's a lot of fun at a party. Probably goes to Wendys for the tossed salad.

Are you a member of the Dead Kennedys?

And they're all just standing around. Jeez, at least go find a Smart Car and toss it around before you throw in on top of the couch.

Um, you can't taste CO2.

Gotta call bullshit on the clear or green bottle = bad due to lack of UV blockage. Think about it. Between the brewery and the packie (that's the liquor or beer store for non-Massholes), when is the beer ever exposed to UVs? And 15 minutes in your back seat ain't gonna do squat. So unless you are in the habit of…

Yea short ribs! Had these growing up, and Dad passed the tongs onto me once he figured out I was better at grilling them (or a secret plot so he couldcould make cocktails without worrying about burning em.

No, she gets a black man between her thighs.

Here is how to fix this: Buy a jug of CLR at the grocery or Lowes. Pour a half cup i.to your EMPTY dishwasher and run it. Repeat. They also sell Dishwasher Magic but it is overpriced and does not work as well. The CLR dissolves all that crap that keeps getting deposited on yourdishes.

I have the perfect solution for your dry toast problem. We too were frustrated by toaster ovens that suck at making toast, and our small kitchen precluded getting a separate toaster. So I imagined a regular toaster combined with a toaster oven, and whaddayouknow Waring makes just such a product. Had it for a couple…

I want to see the video taken by the dads boss when he fires him Monday morning.

All I can think of is Chelsea Handler, who refers to her pussy as her Pikachu. Can't wait to listen to the breathless announcers going on and on about pikachu, while I sit there with a riding crop and a knowing smile.....

Any fool knows that only curly leaf parsley will do for this recipe...just kidding, this dish is in my top 10 things to eat ever. One of those things I keep hoovering down even though I.ve had enough to feed a family of four. Any extra sauce gets mopped up with toasted Italian bread.

Exactly. And if he drives a Prius it runs on batteries with metals mined from the ground and smelted in a factory that is probably spewing out more pollution than the one in the picture.

OR, Why Jesus Diaz Is A Complete Idiot In One Single Headline.

I am not ignorant, just confused. See, I grew up in upstate NY, so it was sprinkles, but have lived in the Boston area for 30 years, so it's jimmies. Luckily I outgrew my affection for those mini sugar/chalk pellets shortly after my ninth birthday.

No no no this is perfect. Gotta get bad before you can get good. Boo hoo for the season ticket holders.

I am cancelling my subscription!

Was this new and improved comment format put together by a team of 10 year olds?