yardape3
Keith C
yardape3
Sep 26 2019
26

Welp. My fodder has not been hit with a cannon blast, but you can bet your cannon balls I’m stealing this.

Sep 10 2019
69

“This looks really bad...but we know he can masturbate to completion,” argued Patriots owner Bobby Two-Strokes*. “Surely, I can still find something for him to do.” Read more

Sep 10 2019
171

So rather than genuine personality conflict, it sounds like the dispute between Antonio Brown and Ben Roethlisberger was more of a “Tastes Great / Less Filling” type of problem. Read more

Sep 10 2019
96

Yeah, man. The lucrative field that gold diggers have been utilizing for years: being raped. 

Sep 10 2019
273

The reason real he and Ben Roethlisberger didn’t get along was because they were too similar.

Sep 10 2019
527

I think I can sue AB for assault after reading that text message. It definitely gave me brain damage.

Sep 7 2019
10

I know this happened in the Unitedstatesistan, a savage land whose political rule is passed down hereditarily by one ethnic group’s elite and which has few if any worker rights and safety nets, but a basis tenet of labour law in civilized countries is that an employer has to use progressive discipline before Read more

Sep 7 2019
54

Yeah, I doubt there is any contract you can sign in any business where you get $30M guaranteed and then immediately jet off to live in the Mediterranean and never be seen again, while the other side just shrugs their shoulders and says “Oh, well. I guess we have to keep paying him.” I would bet that the “guarantee” Read more

Sep 7 2019
71

I’m extremely confused by all of this. He tried to fight his boss and has on multiple occasions refused to show up to work, and Deadspin’s biggest bone of contention seems to be that the Raiders are being unfair by not guaranteeing his salary.

Sep 7 2019
74

Thank you for this. Deadspin has been caping for AB during this whole thing when it is 100% AB's fault. None of the other hundreds of players have his problems, but somehow this is all the Raiders' fault. 

Sep 7 2019
34

Oh, God. I was getting all worked up about how much I should hate everyone involved in this story and this didn't even occur to me. 

Sep 7 2019
145

I am an attorney. A bad one, but that is besides the point. I believe there a clause that any guarantees can be voided for “conduct detrimental to the team.” I would say committing a potential felony against the head coach and calling the GM “cracker” in front of the team meets that standard. But what do I know. 

Sep 7 2019
13

I have an idea of what kind of person being dwells in that house and I’m pretty sure even Pennywise would stay far away from that house.