Acting like they’d won the superbowl when it hasn’t even passed in the Senate yet, to say nothing of the moral shittiness of the bill itself.

Is he though? I’m begining to suspect we all think he’s a great actor because he’s always telling us he is.

Just for reference: I rarely drink alcohol, but I smoke weed every day.

The thing about the Rabbi Shmuley selfie is what is written ON the whiteboard: Muslim Ban (checked as completed) - this accidental evidence will kill the White House’s contention (in the appellate courts) that the travel restrictions were anything other than religious discrimination (and leave no room to argue that…

Michael was a beautiful angel, you monster.

I always stifle a laugh when people say that congress will be a check on him. Permit me to not invest any hope in Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell.

I am seriously starting to think about preparing to leave the country. It would be very, very difficult, and not what I want to do at this stage in my life, but I think it’s not a bad idea to at least have a plan. Things may get very bad very quickly, and we may not be allowed to leave once the shit hits the fan. I…

Well, now let’s remember, we still don’t know all the facts. Did the kid speak to (or possibly look at) officers in a manner that was “disrespectful”? Did he have any prior misdemeanors on his record that gave him an aura of criminality that police would instantly detect using their paladin abilities? Did he have bad…

The gay spirits will rise from the corpses and haunt the funeral home forever with festive parties and a keen fashion sense.

If Jeff Session prosecutes somebody for laughing at him, I should be on death row.

Don’t you get it? The mailbox was Haldeman!

“falling”? i believe you meant that in past tense. i been in love with him for years. 

“I am available always.”

Great Value Brand sisters....Hollering at my desk. #savage

Oh, you’re too outdoorsy for a woman. This must be it.

Counterpoint:

The only reason you have trouble breathing is because you were greedy enough to start breathing in the first place.

We need health care. Not insurance.