I must go, my home dugout needs me.

And... He recovers.

All of you are going to make a comment about Theismann breaking his leg, but unlike you, I’m going to take the high road and say that Theismann is a fucking idiot.

Clearly, the approximate 8,000 daily calories consumed by a Tour de France rider are spread out

Well no wonder. Everyone knows you have to inject yourself with the horse steroids BEFORE you eat the eight thousand calories. Jesus, what an amateur.

The Bucs plan on educating Wilson on how to safely handle fireworks by immediately releasing him.

A Buccaneer with a hand injury. VERY ORIGINAL CJ!

Counterpoint:

They don’t even have the very basics down. Like, that’s not how towels work, guys.

Big props to them. They obviously knew they had no right to be in that competition, other than their country needed someone to represent. Seems they just went and had a good time. Not easy to block the rest out. Good job, dudes.

Michael Bay: [cums]

Not the first time that Bolt Bus has welcomed an explosion on their buses

Simmons may be something of a blowhard these days, but his writing is still great when he wants it to be, and he’s at least somewhat self-aware of his own ego. Taking ESPN’s side would be like rooting for the Joker because you’re pissed at Harvey Dent.

I hope the family as the expressed written consent of MLB to replay that video to friends.

Not only did every member of his family capture the moment, they did it in landscape, as God intended.

The most impressive part of this feat is that of the 4 people filming it, they all had their camera’s oriented correctly.

I really hope they do “Guess today’s attendance”

Ray Lewis would never stand for such atrocities. There will never be blood on his hands.