Totally into this. When all the satire comes out and gets good these are gonna be fun. Imagine with the sassy cross-stitch ladies could do with one of these.

My car got broken into once in and the Daly City Police department called me weeks later because Clarence Thomas had been found with my id and other stolen items.

Can I use this as an excuse to discuss on my block season 2 with anyone? None of my friends are watching! I just finished last night and ran that show sure does make you laugh and cry.

YES!!!!! Is this a Flowers in the Attic situation? Or perhaps like a Boylen one? Just rewatched the Tudors and her dad made her read ALL her letters from the king out loud.

Eeryvody knows a big girl looks great in floral fab. Bring on the bold! What is this lady even smoking? She should try to make her model look even bigger, take up more space, be louder, stand out, win. 

Okay archive is WAY more Vatican than computer in terms of linguistic association, but more importantly what the fuck is a HARD DISC??

As someone who also lost a pregnancy and was HELLA traumatized by it, and who is often triggered around it, I hear ya but don’t get it at all. What’s the difference between this and anyone else discussing pregnancy and its existence? Like....when I hear about miscarriages I get really upset (not at them, but my body…

I thought Joey King was one of little gay boys from youtube that Ellen likes to feature and was like “wow those pants are so amazing he sure knows what is up!” Still like the pants a lot.

Forshadowing. Kris is having him offed soon. 

“i .... love u bye. das dat on dat. enjoy,” Grande is an adult white woman. I wonder when she decided she was going to just start talking like the people around her instead of her parents. People with accents different from their parents fascinate me. Not like kids of immigrants who have accents, bit like Dorit the…

Huh. Life sure is full of surprises. 

Screenshots. The guilt is proven already. It's not court we get to shun someone based on evidence like screenshots. 

This was a weirdly meta thing to write.

How was that orange sweaty man legolas?

Crucial facts. 

The bar graph is flawed thusly: the y axis should be the age of his lady dates. It doesn’t need to be his age because his age already goes up every year along with the years on the x axis. They just created a graph of his age vs. time passing, which is hilarious.

Miranda Lambert has a tiny face squished into the middle of her head and there was a man...maybe a politician? Who also had this. Who was he? Who does she look like?

My favorite episode was the Scientology one, bit the best TITLE is the Hester Prynne of Calabasas. Genius. Will miss you ladies.

I like to imagine that this conversation is us screaming at each other in a fire tornado. 

Whatever JELLY ARMS McDEXTRAFINGERS. We get it. You can pick locks with your spider leg looking magic digits. You used to tinker with automatons. You pin tiny insects to foam boards and never make typos. Not all of us have coordination. Some of us are left handed and permanently slightly crippled by society’s failure…