“Chyna and Boy then hit the Grammy Awards...”

I do not want to admit this. But I sometimes worry that my mean judgy thoughts, which I cherish, are too easily read on my face. I want Botox so people will think I'm nicer. Specifically the line between my eyebrows. If I think someone is dumb they WILL KNOW and I will not even know I'm doing it. My boss had to tell…

Fair indeed. I wonder if Jez authors can relate- I have noticed a consistent lack of smiling in your bio pics that I assumed was a response to “hey girl you should smile more.” We don't need to look happy all the time! It's cool. 

Oh man all dogs should be shaped like logs. Log dogs furever!

He leaked them. There is no way his penis is worth sharing amongst the ladies. I have never showed my friends the dick pics I receive. You know who shares dick pics? Dudes with dicks.

She made a pun! It’s about money and actual, multiple men named Benjamin conspiring to prioritize violent Zionism. Not even kidding. It’s LITERALLY about Benjamins. Y'all read the BuzzFeed article on Soros? Damn!

Im obsessed with munchausen’s for some reason right now. My roommate that just got evicted turned out to have stolen half a million dollars!! It is turning my world upside down in terms of what crazy people will say to get attention or ahead. Believe survivors. 💯. But my head is spinning lately after personally…

It’s Jennifer Aniston’s turn to have tabloids report on her and Brad, with the new fresh perspective of “poor Brad, how will he hold up when he is so pathetic compared to his ex?” she had to deal with that shit for so long, I hope everyone speculates about him going home after the party and getting drunk by himself.

Please please let there never be a scandal involving this man, I have loved him so much ever since he commented on the Olympics with pink eye. 

Wow!! There is definitely a petty part of me that is not satisfied with this story until you find out who they are and out them to everyone that you guys know in person.

Say what now?

I got to the front page of Reddit, got so much fucking karma, and then eventually had to delete my account because of creepy incel trolls. Guess what? I don’t miss the karma! because it was literally fucking nothing. Karma farming is the goddamn weirdest thing I've ever heard of, it reminds me of munchausen's. 

I absolutely love it when you guys post about Niche Community internet drama! Thank you so much. The shit is what Sundays are all about.

By the way, saying youseemed deeply angry is not cool when the person’s anger is so obviously justified and you are the person who deserves it. it makes you seem like you’re judging their emotional reaction, which again I’m sure you didn’t mean to do. I’m sure you’re lovely and you just seem like a crazy bitch. Just…

Is he a Scientologist too? Anything involving Moss is suspect.

I am happy for him. Being a celebrity seems insane. Most of them either end up loving drugs, God, or literally dying young. Going on a vegetarian diet for the wrong reasons still reduces greenhouse gasses. Daniel was probably a hippie. Evangelical leadership is obviously terrible but on an individual basis I am happy…

Man, I read “fingerbanging is back." Fan Bingbing, you are great I'm sure. But no one is as great as fingerbanging. So. A little disappointed. 

No one is outraged. They would just rather not, and they're the ones paying for it. So they said something. Complaining is actually incredibly useful and often appropriate. It also isn't always outrageous. It's just like ...no thanks. 

I do not think it is too late. How old are you? If you are older than 60 it may be too late. But the older you are, the less you actually have to pay off your student loans! Do you know how many people are jealous of you? How many people would love to just be able to die to get out of their debt? Sounds like a win-win…

I literally don’t know how long we can survive in this state. Longing! Horror! Is there a single word that describes these feelings?