I hate that island sooo f-f-fucking muuuuuch

Camp has been dead since opiate deaths beat out AIDS deaths. Everyone go home.

What? Turkey beautiful, it’s is a thing.

The only response to such twitter twatwafflery:

Used to just cover the ice at salad bars. Now it gets a frickin’ massage.

ZATT IZ NOT MAI BORHD

Niiiiice. I have an enduring and unironic affection for that movie. And not just because of Jean-Luc-Gay-Superhero Picard.

“And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred.” Matthew 4:2 (King James)

That, “...combined with a form of fusion,” as Morpheus says to Neo.

Walton Goggins is no longer the brash, fresh-faced detective mucking shit up on The Shield.

That’s Todd FUCKING Bonzalez to you, bortch.

Diet coke has not contained phenylalanine since 2005.

All that and it keeps your broccoli supply cool and crisp for snacking?

Ramm Rider: a shadowy flight into the cramped world of a man who does not think things through. Billy Ramm, a forty-something loner on a crusade to champion the cause of the innocent, the helpless, the powerless, in a world of authorities who insist on the proper number of tie-downs...

Lego are always fucking.

Good. Three and done, looking forward to it. No series should go more than five, by design. Breaking Bad? Perfect. Sopranos? Two seasons too long. Babylon 5? Yes. Sons of Anarchy needed two seasons of Irish fat excised. Justified, though amazing, was one season away from the tightest it could’ve been. Deadwood? Two…

I’m not sure I can do the fan thing and embrace the cheese, here, because this was traaaaaaash.