Monster.

“I’ve never been on a surfboard in my life!”

Not hating at all - just watching this mellowed my afternoon.

NO TUNA CURRY
NO PEACE

I use a mixer, with a chilled bowl and beaters. It makes a difference, even with the machine. As a twice-a-year thing, I make it in quantity, so I don’t mind hauling out the Sunbeam.

BURN ALL THE JOYLESS THINGS

I dunno, my doom doesn’t feel particularly encompassed. Help me out, here?

Over hear in white movie land I’m just holding onto Tom Hanks for dear life. Like don’t let me down man, please.

Wait, I’m an idiot. Though technically Live and Let Die wasn’t a GNR song.

It would be better if he had never released Chinese Democracy and just went straight up Howard Hughes the rest of his life.

But then we would’ve never known what a GNR James Bond theme song sounds like.

I feel like America is in desperate need of a revolution, or a costumed vigilante, or just something!

Why?

Same people. Same jokes. Same situations. I think I’m finally over it.

A hot, percolated, wet, dirty martini is truly one of life’s greatest pleasures.

Will it pipe POTATOPOTATOPOTATOPOTATO through a subwoofer?

For safety, you know.

wust-eh-CHESTer-bobble

C) Eat your own arm, sell book rights, go mad, eat surviving child later because you “got peckish,” sell movie rights.

*And Bronski Beat.

Only one. And there’s a list, and forms to fill out. And you can’t have one.

This is not a grand staircase. This is a stumpy attempt at a grand staircase that someone saw in movie once.