Janoris: “Your wife is ugly. Your dad is a murderer.”

Nah, I’m sure Greg Schiano was jacking off to that whole thing.

Why is notre dame still talked about like a prestige program? They have 1 national title in 30 years. That’s the same number of fake girlfriends by players. Two students have died on their watch. The Rudy movie also sucked. What am I missing here?

The Absolut Jackshit Bowl will be a real thing in 3 years.

He is only accountable to the Pope

Producing the box score for this game will now qualify for a math degree at both schools.

“That Brown fella is pretty good!” - my cousin who only watches football on Thanksgiving

What does the internet got to do with this?

Oof. Too bad he wasn’t a sight guy.

Hitler did some good stuff too, you know. For example, he killed Hitler.

Upon realizing just how little Trump and his team grasped about the presidency, the advisors assigned to help the transition effort were allegedly devastated: “A few of them can barely say Trump’s name without their voice cracking.”

“ Trump’s team had (as of Wednesday) literally no pages”

Advisor: The President faithfully executes

I usually root against Pitt but fuck Dabo in his entitled ass.

So how many people died in the process of dressing up the cats? i refuse to believe at least one dick was not torn off.

This is true. He’s also right. They’re idiots, but they’re useful idiots.

Bowie, Prince, and Ali dead.

I’ll offer this ray of hope. Probably won’t get out of the greys, but it’s worth saying.

2teroid2

“Had a great night. Make 2ure you get your 2hoes from my bathroom.”